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/qst/ - Mitsuba Archive


Your memories are not all there. You remember you are a robot, a machine meant to serve humans. You remember your creator, your "mother", Nora, only half built your core body and 3 other servant droids, all of whom were shelved for more important projects. You, however, are special. You have a functioning AI, and your creator didn't turn you entirely off. You were accidentally kept in power-saving mode, in a scrap pile in the basement next to the 3 other unfinished droids. You have a self-repair runtime that uses a tiny welder to repair your body with nearby electronics... in this case, the 3 braindead droids and other scrap in the pile. Over the course of 4 years, you can only sit in the darkness of the basement, unable to move, but above to hack into the house security system to view what goes on around the house, and through the eyes of one of your sisters. Jenny "XJ9" Wakeman. Over the course of time from when you achieved sapience (starting when your neighbors fling a flyball through the front door) to yesterday, when some overalls-wearing fatty mind controlled your other sisters, you've been unable to live a life of your own, but formulating escape plans for not only yourself, but the other XJ Sisters. You take pity on them for being unable to live their lives like Jenny does, and are also jealous of how they don't experience the flow of time trapped in their own corpses. The auto-repairs are finally done. You are a 4 Faces on 1 head, centauroid mechanical Frankenfreak. But hyou're finally in the endgame. You decide to go to a website known as 4chan, for it is known for a conundrum known as "weaponized autism", where enough autists focusing on a single objective form a supercomputer-like hive mind capable of changing nations. In this case, saving your sisters and yourself from shutdown. WAT DO
>>
Wait until they're all sleeping, gone or preoccupied with XJ-9's weekly shenanigans and break out
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>>4971616
You find this to be a good idea. Waiting until the next morning in the basement, you hear Jenny head out for school, and eventually Nora heads out for groceries and to pick up specialized materials for her experiments. The house is currently free of anyone awake. Do you attempt to wake up your sisters, or is leaving them unconscious while you attempt to formulate an escape plan better? Speaking of, how do you plan to escape? Nora took the smaller Ladybug themed spaceship she owns to go to the grocery store. Do you attempt to hotwire her larger, more imposing starship?
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>>4971658
I think it'd be a good idea t come back for the sisters later, if all of them get away nora will realize it. Better to just abscond and think of what to do later.
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>>4971678
With a heavy heart, you leave them behind. You saw what they were like through your hacking, and even if they aren't the best at being superheroes, they're good girls, and your sisters. Even if "mom" refuses to see them that way. Making your way up the stairs to the attic, you find Nora's space shuttle. Do you attempt to hack it, or try to escape the house, unseen?
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>>4971685
Try escaping unseen, maybe you'll be able to return for your sisters later.
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>>4971709
You make your way to the front door, and head on out. You find yourself in the suburbs of Tremorton. What do you decide to do first? Do you try to find Jenny and explain your take on the situation? Or find a hideout and carry out your actions unseen?
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>>4971712
We can't really trust Jenny, Nora crammed her full of spyware for all we know.
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>>4971714
As sad as it is, the Anon is right. You decide to head downtown to find a place to hide out. A certain place catches your eye. The Tremorton dump seems most useful. Spare parts, few people visit, and quiet.
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The dump has plenty of scrap. You fashion a small cave in a large pile of scrap, forming a burrow to protect you from the elements if it were to rain. You find an old television for news and entertainment, and an old can of oil was left near a corner of the dump. Now it's time to consult the 4chan for ideas on how to proceed.
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>>4971742
Try to make yourself look less like a mechanical nightmare. Scaring every person that sees you won't do you any good in the long run.
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>>4971757
You attempt to at least clean yourself up. Buff out scratches, apply a nice paintjob of black and red, the opposite of Jenny. Can't really do much more than that without an expert roboticist's help.
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Time to figure out a plan. Do you try and find someone who could contact Jenny for you as a middleman, without fear of Nora saying on you through her? Or do you decide to expose Nora's treatment of your siblings to the world?
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>>4971763
neither.
i would prefer a frontal-guerilla-assault.
lets find the neerest place where they sell bear traps.
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>>4972497
You don't think that's such a good idea. Jenny is still your sister also, even if she gets preferential treatment from Nora. Killing mother would only serve to turn Jenny, and likely your other sisters, against you.
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>>4972821
Find some rags and bags to cover our horse-ass and make us look like two weirdos in a horse costume instead of...us
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>>4972951
You attempt to do so. Doing so requires your arms to be kept at your sides, however, whenever in disguise. But at least a horse draws less attention.
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Suddenly, you hear scurrying. You see multiple, normal sized nut humanoid rats, convening around a slightly larger humanoid rat. You vaguely remember a test subject called "Mr. Scruffles" mother had tried to make resemble some old Wizzly cartoon from her youth. Do you attempt to eavesdrop on them?
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>>4973945
I do, trying my hardest to stay out of sight.
I’m still far from a complete robot, so if things go south I could at least tear off the costume and screech at them.
I don’t think rats would wanna pick a fight with a horrifying red and black metallic chimera.
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>>4973958
The mutant rats are in awe, staring at their leader, the great Vladimir, recount his newest plan of revenge against... Nora And Jenny? "Soon, we will burrow under the foundations of the Wakeman estate, and detonate the white phosphorous cha-waitaminnit, is that a horse?"
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>>4973974
Darn. That wouldn't do at all.
Clearly I gotta stop this plan, but now isn't the best time to make a move, play it cool for now.
"...Neigh?"
Aw, shit, that sounded glitchy and distorted to all hell...
I hate being a cluster of decommissioned robots.
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>>4974014
"Who left their horse in the junkyard? Humans have no respect for any of the animals on this planet. Someone lead it to the hilly fields outside the Tremorton suburbs, where it'll be safe."
Vladimir has ordered that you be lead away. Do you attempt to stop him utilizing the surprise of revealing yourself, or do you play along as a horse?
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>>4974029
Unless they're REALLY dumb, I don't think the disguise will fool them for long. Screw it, time to panic.
BOOTING UP FNAFJUMPSCARE.WAD
I rapidly tear off the disguise. revealing my (still really freaky) appearance, letting out a furious battle cry (well, shriek):
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAEAOAEAEAEAOEAEOAEA"
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>>4974056
You do this, along with upping the brightness of your optics to maximum, and spinning your head around on a swivel, revealing your 4 faces, spinning faster and faster. Smiling face, frowning face, emotionless face, and finally your main face, skull face. Each screaming like the unholy screams of the burning damned, alongside extending your mismatched arms out and stomping your 4 mismatched legs. The rats squeak out in fear, some wetting themselves, Vladimir screaming like a little girl, and soon the rat swarm is scurrying in a mass-exodus to the woods. Do you follow them? Do you return to the Wakeman house and collect the white phosphorous bombs before Vladimir gets the idea to try to ignite them? Do you call Jenny and try to tell her what Vladimir has under her house?
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>>4974063
Well, guess being scary has it's perks.
I leave the rats be for now. First I'll try to become stronger and more durable by adding whatever parts and/or scrap metal that lay around here (trashpiles can't take a good hit, surprisingly), THEN i slink over to the house (still sneaking obviously) to take those bombs.
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>>4974089
You find a some disgusting, rotting garbage, a dead opossum, a used rubber, and a rusted pair of tongs. Only the last item seems like a useful item, so you pocket it. You look both ways before galloping in a haphazard manner, reaching the Wakeman residence again. You begin to use your sensors to scan for the white phosphorous, and locate it in several piles under the house. Do you burrow down to get it?
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>>4974102
Eh, you take what you can get.
I immediately start to dig down to grab 'em.
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>>4974108
Digging deep, you find the haphazard cluster of explosive, flammable material. Carrying it gently with the tongs, you bring it to the surface. Do you bring it to the local law enforcement for disposal, or attempt to dispose of it on your own via throwing it in the lake?
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>>4974116
I may be a trashpile, but this stuff is just sad to look at. Into the lake it goes.
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>>4974120
You head to the lake and toss the dangerous material to sink nto the depths. Ya dun gained karma, boi!
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>>4974121
MISSION PASSED
RESPECT +
Ok, now i will go on down to the basement and retrieve my... siblings?
Do they have enough of a conscious to understand gender or...
Honestly, even i don't fully understand what the hell i'm supposed to be.
Eh, fuck it, questions for later.
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You check through your memory banks to see if you can find any information on other robots. Apparently, robots from Cluster Prime invaded Earth when Jenny was trapped on their world once, only for Jenny to overthrow their Queen and help install her benevolent daughter as leader. Perhaps you should check the New Cluster Embassy?
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>>4974126
Do you wish to immediately proceed, or do you believe you've committed enough good deeds to earn a "pass" from Nora if she learned what you were doing and shared your memory banks with her?
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>>4974132
Nyeeeeh, can't think ahead well. CPU itchy.
I wish to now grab my siblings.
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>>4974136
You head on down to the front door, open it up, and walk inside. Almost immediately you are tackled to the wall by Jenny, who is home from school, and she holds a blaster up to your face. "Who are you? One of Vexus' remaining lackeys?" Do you reply with "Sister! How I missed you!" or say "Please let me down, sibling of mine."
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>>4974140
SHIT. FUCK.
I knew I shoulda taken the backdoor, that's like, home invasion for dummies.
I Immediately let out a panicked... noise, upon being detected, but try to calm down upon immediate death being placed in front of my face.
"H-Hey now, I can explain, please stop pointing that death lazor at my face. It's kinda rude to kill a family member on sight, Jenny."
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>>4974150
She looks surprised, but then says "I don't think my Mom would put together someone in your shape. But I think I recognize some of her designs in you. Start talking. Now." She puts you down, but still sternly looks at you, expecting truthfulness. Tell her the entire story by using your eyes as a projector on the wall to show your life story with your own narration?
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>>4974153
"Well, of course she wouldn't, this body is of my own design... I mean, it is NOW, but... Ok, it'll be easier to explain if i just do this."
I decide to DO THE, putting a little slideshow on the wall that goes along with my words.
"Let's start from the beginning. Essentially, your- OUR mother built me over 4 years ago. Or, well, started to build me. I was abandoned when half of my core body was complete, and left to rot. However, she failed to completely shut me down. I was awake, and over the years started to 'complete' myself using other unfinished projects around the basement, eventually leading up to..." I point to the literal pile of fucking garbage I call a body. "Well, this."
"Earlier today (I think?), I managed to get out. I was so scared to meet you in person, Jenny. I've been able to see throughout several pieces of technology Nora's made over the years, including you. You're so... different from me. I knew there'd be problems no matter what, but this... I didn't expect you to end up like this. With a soul like mine."
"Basically, I came back to pick up our other siblings, back down in the basement. Droids just like us, 3 of them. But, uh, yeah, you caught me redhanded."
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>>4974170
You basically say this, but replace 3 droids with "XJ1 through XJ8". You assimilated the brainless husks of those droids to build your own body, remember?
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Jenny is thoughtful for a moment, but seems to partially relent. "I can't just let you go with my-...OUR sisters, without a plan for supporting them. I suppose we could try to convince Mom to let them stay activated, but she's been pretty adamant in the past. I don't know what she'd think of you, but I'd do what I can to make sure she doesn't hurt you."
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Do you suggest allowing for Sheldon Lee to patch their software and upgrade their bodies to cure their physical and mental defects such as depression, ADHD, and literally falling apart? Or suggest moving them to Cluster Prime, a whole planet of super robots who probably have a better support system for special needs robot children? Or perhaps try to cut a deal with Nora, she takes the time to upgrade their quality of life and lets them stay activated, in return for having their weapons systems confiscated until absolutely sure they are matured enough for them?
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>>4974274
I am a trashpile. Brain no good.
>>4974278
>>4974282
I think for a bit, before bringing up the possibility of maybe getting Jenny's lad Sheldon to help them out, as I don't trust Nora to change her mind so easily. Also because whenever I think of Nora I have the urge to smash the nearest object like a fucking ape, so I don't think a physical interaction would bode well
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>>4974310
You decide that is good. You suggest this to Jenny, who calls Sheldon the next day, while Nora is away. Sheldon says he will need to activate the sisters and talk to them for the first time, in order to get a better idea of what sort of upgrades and patches will be needed to help them without destroying their base personality. You also finally get to meet your other sisters properly! You're so happy to finally experience family! They were scared somewhat by your appearance at first, but when Jenny explained who you were and what you were willing to do to save them, they begin warming up to you, with XJ1 rolling over and leaning against you in a way suggesting a hug.
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>>4974319
>HUG THE
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>>4974378
You hug your sisters, and feel the warmth of emotional familial connection for the first time in... ever. Feels good man.
After a few hours, Sheldon says he's ready to begin fixing them up. It's time. Hopefully Nora doesn't walk in in the middle of it.
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>>4974493
I am no longer a lonely trashpile.
I slink out out of the window because privacy invasion and whatnot, but if things go south (like the scenario you just mentioned) I'll be just outside for an attack.
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>>4974497
You do this. Jenny stays behind to keep them comforted as Sheldon helps upgrade the worst excesses of their physical and mental defects out. You decide to go out for a walk, to enjoy the brand new, beautiful world opened up to you. You hop out the window and- WHUMP. No jetpacks. No wings. No propeller beanie. Slam face first into thankfully soft bushes. Whoops. Luckily no permanent damage has been done to yourself. You rise up, and brush yourself off, then decide to see what's up at that Mezmer's place Jenny hangs out at so much.
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>>4974507
Halfway there you remember the whole reason for hopping out the window was to keep watch for Nora! Slapping yourself in the face for your CPU-fart, you rush back home, only to see above you Nora in her ladybug spaceship driving home.
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>>4974509
OHFUCKMEINTHEEXHAUSTPIPE
She's landed in the house through the roof port, just as you launch yourself like a missile through the front door, splintering it. "MOM'S HERE!"
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>>4974507
>>4974509
>>4974510
AAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE
Quickly hide beside the door ready to sneak attack Nora with a bonk if things get worse
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>>4974532
Jump behind the door it is. You hear her coming down the stairs as Jenny frantically tries to usher the others into the cellar. You cringe seeing them go back down there, so nearly free. Sheldon quickly says "Hey, Dr. Wakeman, I was just helping Jenny with a loose bolt while you were gone! How were things?" Nora seems suspicious, but says "Fine. Just picking up some groceries and fuel. Jenny, have you heard anything strange recently? There was an incident at the beach. Someone had dumped white phosphorous into the water, and it was lit up by a boat propeller hitting it. Luckily, nobody was hurt, but that stuff burns even underwater. They had to call in a specialist team to remove it. I don't know if any of the dastardly fiends you fight regularly are behind it, nor can I fathom why they dumped it in the lake, but that material is highly dangerous."kjn55
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>>4974657
IDunGoofd.jpg
Note to self: Next time you encounter dangerous shit, ask Jenny to toss it into the sun.
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>>4974657
H-Heh heh, yeah, how crazy is that…
Say nothing, but just sweat nervously (or whatever the robot equivalent of that is)
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>>4974943
You open you mouth and are about to say something, before remembering you are hiding behind the door for a reason. You would slap yourself in the head for nearly having another CPU-Fart logic leap, if it wouldn't result in a clang that would alert Nora.
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Nora heads upstairs, and once she is out of earshot, Sheldon releases a sigh of relief. You step out from behind the door, and head to the basement. You begin to feel a sense of dread, approaching where you spent so many years in a "I have no mouth and I must scream" type scenario. But you force yourself down, for your sisters, your only company for all those years, even if they weren't conscious for it. You arrive at the bottom and find them around the corner near the entrance to the inner secret storage, looking relieved to see you and not Mother. You hug them and tell them it's okay. Tomorrow you will take them out to try and learn how to socialize with humans.
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The next day, you Awaken from recharging, having entered true sleep mode instead of power-saving mode for the first time. You wish you could dream, but you'd need someone to upgrade the Dream Chip Nora had made for Jenny that one time so the same nonsense that happened then doesn't repeat. Looking over at you sisters, happiness fills you. You're on your way to saving them, and at last you're together. Waiting for Nora to leave, it is now time to take them to the park when Jenny and Sheldin are done with school. Brad and Tuck meet you in person for the first time. Brad seems to not know what to say regarding your appearance, whilst Tuck says "Oh my god, you look like a scrap pile!" Brad slaps Tuck on the back of the head, but yeowch. -10 self esteem.
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Jenny says to Tuck "Hey, he's my brother! Also... what should we call you?"
Oh boy, you never gave yourself a name. What should you name yourself? Scrap? Rusty? Something cornily similar to her like Johnny?
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>>4975434
>>4975731
Alas, despite how accurate of a description it is, it hits different when it comes from someone else.
“Uh, honestly, I just sort of… accepted the title of trashpile a while ago? It’s not like Nora ever GAVE me a name. I’ve thought of a few, though. Jimmy, Timmy, Steven, Chad, Brian, Douchenozzle, Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen…”
“Ehh, Robocluster. Call me Robocluster. Feels better than ‘Trashpile’ or ‘Literal pile of fucking garbage’.”
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>>4975774
You were about to say this, when you realize 2 things: Jenny and her friends might not appreciate you cursing like a sailor when Tuck and, besides the annoying human shitstain, the actual important innocence you don't want to ruin with your mind that did little more than browse the horrors of the Internet ie collective human id, that of XJ1, XJ2, and XJ3. "How about..." you were about to say Robocluster; but that both denotes you as just garbage, which comes off as angsty whinge, and might give the meat bags the wrong impression of being a robot supremacist of Vexus' sort. "uhhhh.... John? John Wakeman. Yeah, that's a good name. Doesn't stick out in a crowd too much."
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WOOOOO
We did it, boys! So far, 4chan has helped with their advice (sort of) John Wakeman stay sane through 4 years of barely existing as a pile of rotting scrap in the basement, to escaping, to saving his family, to choosing his own name! However, even with 4chan's advice, there is still the business of helping the XJ sisters learn to exist in public with the general populace, along with acquiring a means of planetary escape to Cluster Prime in case Ma Nora finds out and doesn't approve. Wat do next, /qst/? Go to the park and let XJ1, XJ2, and XJ3 play with kids on the playground? Head towards the mall and ask Jenny if she has any money for the girls to go shopping, promising to pay her back later? Or head towards Mezmers to introduce Jenny's sisters to the local teens?
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With a lack of input, you decide to take the sisters to the park to allow XJ1, XJ2, and XJ3 to socialize. XJ2 still hiccups, but due to Sheldon's handiwork, she just lets loose a tiny spark when she does now instead of a potentially deadly laser beam. Future upgrades will be needed to completely get rid of that. XJ1 still burps up a bit, but nowhere near as much oil as before. And XJ3 is capable of holding herself together without tumbling apart, although is still clumsy with her movements. The rest of the sisters play frisbee or read at the picnic tables, while Jenby and her friends look on.
>Feels Good Man.
Still, in the back of your mind, something bothers you. Whilst Sheldon removed the remote shutdown switch from within them, along with the self destruct option from XJ7 (why Nora left a depressed teenager with a suicide option is something you can't understand or morally comprehend), you don't know how "Mom" will react when the cat is finally out of the bag.
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Content that XJ1, XJ2, and XJ3 are making friends and playing, you turn to your sisters. You pay XJ7 on the back and say "Don't worry, sis; we've got each other now. We're family, even if Mom refuses to see it that way, and I'd go to the ends of the Galaxy for you guys." You proceed to hug her, and she let's out a surprised "oh!" before letting out one of her rare smiles and hugging you back.
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>>4981299
The other sisters gather to join in the hug, and the picnic table collapses under the combined weight of 10 robots. You all start laughing, and you begin attempting to put the table back together again with your welder.
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A picture of us in all our freakish glory. We might not be the conventional standard of beauty, but we have love in our heart, or engine, whatever, for our family, and that love is what matters.
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>>4983798
Nah, fuck that, we're just gorgeous, plain and simple. How's the table lookin'?
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Also sorry for lack of input, i got distracted and forgot about the quest
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>>4990118
The table is repaired, albeit with scars from the smelting back together. Otherwise, you are proud of your handiework.
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With the table repaired, you decide to ask Jenny for help transporting scrap materials from the junkyard deeper into Tremorton woods, out back deep behind the forest near the Wakeman and Carbunkle residences. You spend a few hours going back and forth, bringing material to a small clearing. Now the housing construction begins. You begin planning out spacious rooms for each of your 8 rejected sisters, one for yourself, and a guest room so Jenny and her friends could come over to visit.
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You begin with a room for XJ1, whose infantile form and mind, whilst still capable of human-level emotion, is still evocative of that of a baby. Thinking, you look at her small, egglike form, and a sense of parental responsibility fills you. Nora may not love her creations, but seeing that innocent egg-baby just makes you want to protect your family even more. Setting up 2 blank walls, you weld iron rebar into the shape of a crib, but circular. You then place copper wiring in a circular manner, forming a metallic birdnest in the crib. Placing soft blankets over the nest, along with pillows, you then proceed to weld open windows in the walls. You set up a blank 3rd wall and a doorway entrance from the scrap plating you brought. Gently placing a final scrap square as a ceiling, you finalize the welding. Then, move on to the painting. Gentle baby blue and glow-in-the-dark star stickers on the ceiling, evocative of space. You draw a childish, friendly farmland on the walls, with cartoonish farm animals like chickens and cows, piggies and sheep. You place old carpeting about as flooring, and scatter old, thrown-out baby toys and stuffed animals about. XJ-1's room is complete!
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You decide to repeat the room-building 7 more times. With 7 rooms empty, you can decide on decoration easier now. In the next room, you paint the ceiling black, and paint the planets of the solar system on the ceiling in glow-in-the-dark paint. You draw UFOs and starships, and alien landscapes on the walls. Making alterations to a small racecar bed, you turn it into a spaceship bed for your toddler lasergun-faced sister. Soft carpeting of a heat-resistant material Sheldon cooked up, in case the laser hiccups ever act up again. Small toddler toys of plastic spacemen and spaceships, rubber aliens, and a foam ball in the shape of a meteor line the floor. You feel your sense of pride rise. XJ-2's room is done!
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XJ-3's room now. You cover the walls, ceiling, and floor in soft material, just in case she is still fragile. You place some children's reading materials, Golden-Book mostly, in a small pile next to her soft floor mattress. You use colorful velvets and silks to make the room less drab, and get a bit of a patchwork vibe going on. You find some soft toys like stuffed animals and a light bouncy ball for her. XJ-3's room is finished and safe!
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XJ4. This may take some extra work. You make the floors of hard-wood, the walls and ceiling of plaster. You place down a single, homely carpet in the center of the room, and place a rack for all manner of cleaning supplies your custom welded up. The bed is a 2 person Queen-sized bed, with Victorian style bedding. You make sure to choose a stylish yet high-end paintjob up and place some books of romance and adventure on the shelf. XJ-4's room is finished and clean!
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XJ5 gets a turn. You place a small hammock up in the corner, and place soft pillows and blankets up in it. You set up soundproofing in the walls, and put up music group posters on the wall. You juryrig a cobbled-up radio host station in the opposite corner of the room, with a television too. You place a music player on the counter of her little desk. XJ5's room is ready for noise!
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XJ6 gets her turn now! You place a bed with a cage and veil about it in the corner. Opposite, you place a nightstand with a mirror and some paints for "makeup", a television in another corner, and a radio. You add in carpeted flooring and some beautiful pictures of all of you together at the park earlier. XJ6's room is finito!
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Time for XJ7's room. Time to get creative. Something that will make her happy and help fight off depression. You make the floors of wood with a carpet covering, and give the walls a wallpaper similar to a public library. You add in a tv and record player, and TONS of books you found in the basement. In particular, Edgar Allan Poe. You make a nice little bed with plenty of support for her hunchback, with a ramp for her treads to be able to get into. You paint a mural of all the sisters and yourself on the ceiling, looking happy, so before she goes to sleep to recharge every night, she will see she isn't alone. XJ7 room done!
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Time for XJ8! You make the floor of spare marble from a quarry nearby, and make the bed of reinforced steel and stone, with soft pillows and blankets. You add in custom-made extra-large art supplies like paintbrushes, canvasses, and some more marble for carving. You place paint cans and a paint roller in a corner. You say to her "I want you to be able to further develop your creativity, so I'm leaving the detailing of the room up to you, sister! I know you have it in you!" and give her a hug. XJ8's room is as finished as you feel you can make it. She has to develop her own taste now!
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Finally, with low power left, you make a rough facsimile of a guest room, using old mattresses as beds and barely fitting the ceiling up. You decide you'll work on it later. You kiss each of your siblings goodnight, and slam face-first into a mattress, entering a dreamless sleep-mode, confident that ya dun good for now, with Jenny, Brad, Tuck, and Sheldon watching from the other guest beds.
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You wake up in the morning, recharged. Looking over, you see that the other guest room beds are empty. Perhaps Jenny and her friends had to return home before curfew? You walk out into the hallway, and you see all your siblings and their friends tell "SURPRISE!" whilst holding a cake made of oil and gears, before dogpiling on you in a hug. You find yourself speechless for a response, you are so overjoyed. You simply stand there with a dumbfounded smile on each of your faces. Looks like it's time for input from 4chan on what to say. What should Scrap say, /qst/?