You are Wesley Keki, purveyor of things cute and funny, and evacuee.PREVIOUSLY:-Amber brought you along on her plan to infiltrate an Instrumentalist council meeting. She also brought along Will, to your chagrin. And you brought along Lily, to her chagrin.-Tyrus intercepted you at Shake 'em Up before you could head for the main event. -Tyrus was about to take you all home when Buridan crashed a semi trailer through the wall and tried to kidnap Amelia. -The group fought off Buridan and his fellow Instrumentalist enforcers, with help from Gideon, who showed up during the firefight. Tyrus wounded Buridan badly.-Tyrus and his Russian associate Stasi apprehended Gideon, and despite his help, prepared to torture him for info. You intervened to question him in a more peaceable way.-Gideon shed some light on the cult, its worldview and goals, as well as its shibboleths.-Buridan broke into Talia's apartment and forced her to field dress his wounds, which included a collapsed lung.-Will pickpocketed Tyrus's car keys. Then it was off to the races: you, Amber, Will, and Lily made an escape, still intending to visit that council meeting. Not even the car's anti-theft locks could stop you -- you just left the car behind and pulled a GTA on another unsuspecting motorist.-While you committed major felonies, bad weather brewed. A major storm system formed and moved over Palo Alto. Soon, evacuation orders were issued.-You stole a mask from Auburn's mother, to blend in at the meeting, and rendezvoused with Auburn himself (unhappily) inside Darkbloom Enterprises.-You arrived to the council meeting in time to witness Absalom Abrams, the cult's leader, give David Darkbloom a gut-churning baptism wherein David's many sins were laid bare for all to hear.-It was a trap. David had intended to murder Absalom at the meeting, but Absalom overpowered him, and his people captured you all -- all except Lily, who evaded detection.-Absalom took you to see Olivia, who recounted her interpretation of the prophecy that has everyone in this cult so het up. Using Tarot cards, she illustrated how you, Amber, and Ophelia are meant to be somehow pivotal in the Instrumentalist cosmology---So anyway, Lily started blasting. Tyrus and Stasi came to back her up. Gideon even helped out again.-Molotovs got thrown, fires burned, and you raced to get the hell out of there.-Tyrus, Gideon, and David stayed in town -- now with Camelia -- set on fighting back against the cult. -Aunt Vivian chained herself to Amber to keep her in line. You went around town gathering the rest of your loved ones -- the Moms, the Denalis, Amelia -- in preparation to leave Palo Alto for drier, campier climes. -Dad was incensed at you for what you did. But he at least seemed to respect the hustle of developing a lesbian harem.-When the group arrived to pick up Talia, Buridan was lying in wait. He shot Dad and then fled on foot -- not before a traumatized Talia got one last lick in on him.
Twitter: https://twitter.com/CeriseSoliloquyFuck Quest master index (including seasons 1-4 of the original quest): https://www.op-studios.net/fqFuck Quest lewd index: https://www.op-studios.net/fq-lewdsWesley's Bizarre Adventure lewds (content not allowed on /qst/ will go here): https://www.op-studios.net/fq-wba-lewdsEpisode 1 ("Wesley's Bizarre Adventure"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4723649Episode 2 ("How Heavy are the Softballs You Pitch?"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4753308Episode 3 ("Read or Die"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4797605Episode 4 ("Winter Wars"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4827485Interlewd ("Tantric Ona Milky Homes"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4842453Episode 5 ("Ass Class"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4867318Episode 6 ("Fuck/stay night"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4892581Episode 7 ("Unthinkable Natural Law"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4921745Episode 8 (">[x] WAKE UP, Girls!"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4949361---AND NOW, EPISODE 9 OF WESLEY'S BIZARRE ADVENTURE:"Yuri Camp"
For those of you who may have missed it in the last thread, I did finally post a bonus lewd. An extra-stealthy Amber scene with extra mayo.https://www.op-studios.net/fq-lewd-wes17
FIRST FOR SAVING OUR DAD
Renee peels off her bloodied blue latex gloves. She steps on the pedal at the bottom of the biohazardous waste bin, unhinging its lid, and tosses the gloves inside. She picks up Alabaster's chart and makes some notes to herself. Then the hard part. She pulls a stool to the bedside and waits.It takes a couple hours for Alabaster to awaken. His bleary eyes and dry lips part, he looks dazedly up at Renee. She smiles."Ophie," he rasps. "Where--""Whitney's taking her to the campground," Renee lies. Best to keep him calm for the time being. "Amber and Wes are already there."Alabaster's tense expression dissipates. He nods, settles, reposes a little easier in his gurney. The rain is still coming down like hell outside."I died..." he says after a moment."No, you didn't. Didn't even come close, in fact."Alabaster's voice is croaky but his gaze is as full of vitality as ever. "No. No, I died... I'm looking at an angel..."Renee takes a puff of her cigarette and blows the smoke in his face. Alabaster grimaces, coughs. "Fucking -- goddamn it," he grunts. He waves a hand through the smoke to dissipate it. "That is... the last time... I ever compliment you."Renee swivels in her stool, reaches for the countertop, and gathers some ice chips. She swabs Alabaster's chapped lips, cooing at him."How bad is it?" Alabaster asks. He hesitates to pull his covers back."Just a flesh wound!" Renee says."That's the wrong reference if you trying to put me at ease." He takes a moment to wiggle toes and fingers. "Still have my limbs, at least.""Buridan had birdshot loaded in his gun. You took worse damage from the wood splinters off the door. No vital organs punctured, but you did lose a lot of blood -- nicked an artery."Alabaster shakes his head."You seem pretty upset over surviving a shotgun blast to the chest," Renee says, pulling away, throwing the remnants of the ice chips back in the cup. "What's on your mind?""He took so long to answer... and when he fired, he had birdshot in his gun? ... No coincidence. He... reloaded his gun with something nonlethal, when he saw me standing at the door." Alabaster locks eyes with Renee. "He wasn't trying to kill me.""Why do you think that is?" Renee asks."They want me alive. The Instrumentalists. To... rebuild Sand Reckoner..." He fights back a momentary revulsion that manifests as, literally, bile rising in his throat. "Not just me. They weren't actually trying to kill Cerise, either. And David... they could have killed David -- they didn't. They... could have killed my girls... they didn't... they want us all alive. And working on Sand Reckoner..."Renee takes another drag. "Well, tell them to go fuck themselves."Alabaster closes his eyes. "It doesn't," he says. "It doesn't all work out. Does it.""It will," Renee promises him.
>>4983304muh based Renee
Just outside Palo, you all transfer to a Winnebago, a vehicle better equipped for making such a long journey. It isn't too much later when N-Mom gets a call from Aunt Renee, with the news that Dad's injuries are relatively minor (for someone blasted in the chest with a shotgun) and that he'll recover. You have approximately 42 trillion other problems right now, but somehow this makes it feel as if every other problem went away, too. No one you love is dead. Anything else can be weathered.K-Mom drives, with N-Mom in the passenger seat to helpfully bitch at her:"You wanna slow down on these turns? It's not like we're on a mountain or anything.""No. I don't want to slow down on these turns, point of fact. I'd go even faster if this friggin jalopy would let me."N-Mom turns a sickly shade as the Winnebago swings through another hard jackknife turn. You try not to look out the windows on her side because what you'll glimpse is what she's glimpsing, a sheer fall down a rocky cliff face, with only the thin sheet-steel of a guard rail to protect you all from doom. K-Mom takes perverse pleasure in making N-Mom squirm on every curve."Don't be such a wuss," K-Mom says. "I'm hardly pulling 50.""30 would be nice," N-Mom says."65 would be even better. We need to lose some weight if we want to hit a better cruising speed, though." She glances back, sweeps her eyes across the motley group of riders. "We could ditch your new teenage girlfriend for starters. She's got a fat enough ass. Bet we'd gain a few MPH off that."Sitting at one of the tables in back, Summer smiles at K-Mom from over the top of a hand of Go Fish. "You don't wanna toss me out. Who's gonna go fishing with you?" She means a more literal " go fishing" here -- Summer said she wanted K-Mom to teach her how."Yeah," K-Mom grumbles, unenthused.Winter scrunches her face up, contemplating her cards. "Have any sixes?" She asks at last."Go fish," Summer says.Winter pouts. It's cute. But the truth is, Summer's hand runs about 10 cards deep after a particularly unlucky turn, and you can see, standing over her shoulder, that she has a six. "What the fuck, Summer," you say, tipping her hand forward so that it's visible to Winter."You've got to be effing joking me!" Winter groans. "You can't lie in Go Fish!""Says who? Says you?" Summer says.Winter tosses her remaining cards down. "This sucks. I wanted to play cribbage, but noooo. If you're not even gonna play by the rules, I won't play any stupid games with you at all."Summer also tosses her cards down. "Fine by me," she says. She sneers at you. "Traitor.""Cry more," you shoot back. "Cheating at Go Fish is, like, the most pathetic thing.""Sorry, honey, but your girlfriend is right," Liz says. She's standing over by the little stall door leading to the bathroom. It's occupied. She knocks, for maybe the twentieth time. "Talia? Are you done in there yet?" But no answer comes.
was the 422 Amber scene at the zoo canon? seems off for this version of the characters.
>>4983318What the fuck, Summer>>4983320OP did say we could consider it as either in 421 or 422 at the time. For sure we know Amber hasn't slept with Ally yet in 422, so it could still happen later.
Amber grasps for the discarded deck. But, being seated at the table across the Winnebago's central aisle, she can't extend her reach far enough. This is because she's still tethered to Vivian by a pair of handcuffs, who stays immovably in place and peering pensively out the window to their left. The handcuff's links jangle. "I--gh-- fucking-- goddamn it.""Need help?" You ask."Not from you. Olivia. Get me those cards."Olivia sweeps the cards up, not bothering to orient them all in the same direction, and hands them to Amber. Amber sighs in exasperation."Those are my cards," Winter says, snippy. (But what else is new?)Amber points at the table. "Then sit your ass over here.""Why?""You want to play an actually interesting card game or not? Jeeesus."Winter gathers herself up and goes to sit across from Amber -- forcing Olivia to scoot. "What's the game?" Winter asks, as Amber works to reorient and shuffle the deck."Gin Rummy. The rules are simple. Even a tard like you can understand. You start with--""Scoring Hollywood style?" Winter asks.Amber pauses mid-shuffle. "Yeah. Sure." Winter motions for Amber to deal. The game is on.
>>4983304>"They want me alive. The Instrumentalists. To... rebuild Sand Reckoner..."Oh god, oh fuck.
>>4983304Best girl now and forever>>4983318>But no answer comes.Worry
You figure you'd rather not listen to the verbal violence inevitably to ensue when those two play a competitive game, so you walk further towards the back of the Winnebago. Will is vegging out with Amelia on the little sectional couch in the back, watching a Marvel movie on the Winnebago's 60" TV set. You're not sure which Marvel movie. They're kind of all the same."Haha. Man I love Rocket Raccoon," Will laughs, and literally points at the screen.Amelia sighs. "This story makes absolutely no sense." "Who cares about the story?" Will wants to know.Back here there's a little L-shaped countertop and all the accoutrements of a home kitchen -- sink, oven, fridge, microwave. Auburn has a dish towel laid out over the countertop, and a pistol disassembled on it. "You must not have cleaned this thing... ever," he says, turning some of the components over in his hand. "You're supposed to keep your firearm maintained. That's one of the Guardian program's rules--""It's the ruuuuuules," Lily says mockingly. "Yeesh."Auburn frowns at her. "It's the ruuuuuules for a good reason. You don't want your gun jamming when the time comes to use it. If you expect your weapon to take care of you, you have to take care of it.""I know how and when to clean my piece," Lily says. "Not that I mind letting you do the grunt work. But you're getting seriously anal over a little grime here."He takes a toothbrush to the disassembled barrel of the pistol. "Thank me later, then," he says."Thank you never," Lily counters.You slap Lily in the back of the head as you pass her. It makes a satisfying ka-thunk. Lily spins, face a mask of rage: "cunt! If Auburn didn't have my piece pulled apart, I'd fucking shoot you!""Yeah, and if I had a dick, my name would be Gwen."This completely disarms Lily. "What?" She says."...It's a naming convention my mom has. Forget it." You plop down on the couch beside Amelia.
>>4983337... is this a Dark Souls reference of all things?
>>4983337>You're not sure which Marvel movie. They're kind of all the sameTHAT'S OUR GIRL
"Did the Avengers avenge the MacGuffin yet?" You ask."Not yet," Amelia says, having to raise her voice over the explosions on-screen.You nod. A beat passes. "Mind if I take a nap on you?""Go right ahead," Amelia says with a warm smile.You curl your legs up onto the couch and lay your head in her soft, supple lap. It's the perfect pillow, really -- such give and such warmth to it. She strokes your hair in the most gentle and soothing way. "Say, how about we go swimming when we get to the campsite?" She asks."Hmm?""Nothing."A few moments later you fall soundly asleep.When you wake up again, it's nearly dark outside, the sky a shade of deepening indigo. Amelia is sleeping now too, slumped back in place, snoring and drooling. There's something hard poking you in the cheek. But that was to be expected. What K-Mom might call a "known known." Will is still rapt, slackjawedly staring at the screen, with Lily and Auburn now sitting on the ground at the foot of the sofa, equally enthralled. The Avengers are still avenging the MacGuffin, hours later. The overhead lighting is dim, and, looking towards the front of the RV, you see that the girls up front are all asleep at the tables up there, too. The Moms are still bickering -- but more quietly, out of respect for the tired. How sweet... sorta.Feeling somehow antsy, you break your own rule, turn and sit on your knees, and peek through the Venetian blinds behind you. Turns out K-Mom's speeding habit has gotten you there in under half a day. You're just in time to see the vehicle's headlights bounce off a big blue reflective sign that says: Vail - Elevation 8,150 Ft. Vail. Fucking fantastic. Is there anywhere on the face of the planet more boring?OP: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Atvsg_zogxo
>>4983344Cute! Cute!!!>Vail - Elevation 8,150 Ft.YOU WHAT
>>4983337>They're kind of all the same.Shots fired.
Liz is the first one out the door when you park, and races into a thicket as if fleeing an unseen killer. "What's up with her?" You say, rubbing your elbow and stretching luxuriously as you step forth into the periwinkle twilight."Ms. Berenstoin's been hogging the bathroom," Will says. You do a double take. "Still? She was in there the whole drive?"Will shrugs.You step past the other departing passengers to reenter the RV and and knock on the bathroom door. "Talia?" You say. You wait. You get no answer. You knock again. "Talia? Ms. Berenstoin? ... Snuggy Bear? ... Are you okay?" "Yes," is her muffled response.You wait for elaboration. None comes. "We're here. Are you coming out?" But she doesn't answer.You elect to give her space.
>>4983339N Mom or K Mom has this tendency to use opposite gender names for her pets and apparently, children. She had a male rottweiler named Lady, who was succeeded by a female Schnauzer named Guy.
>>4983355Well, yes... I'm aware of this. Just Gwen specifically made me think of Gwyndolyn for some reason. I overthought it, I do that, no bulli. ;w;
You survey the campground. It's a sort of cul-de-sac in the wilderness, situated at the end of a little dirt offshoot from the main path which branches to dozens of other campsites. You see, distantly, the firelight of other people camping in the area, and the many human-shaped silhouettes crowding around. Not exactly roughing it a hundred miles from all known civilization. To the south (uhhh -- you think) you can clearly spy the lights of the city of Vail all along the rocky mountain. The campsite has several little dirt patches arrayed around a concrete burnpit -- designated spaces for tents. K-Mom is all industry as she retrieves the tents from the Winnebago's stowage and gets to work on setting them up. First she grabs each canvas bag containing each individual tent and plops them down in the spots where they will go. Then she starts pitching one. "Can I help?" Winter asks, a genuine and childlike excitement tinging her voice."Someone should," K-Mom says. "I could use a hand."Winter hops to, and works with K-Mom. It's odd how fast and efficient they are without verbally communicating. Is this the true power of camping?"Liv, help me get ours set up," Amelia says.But Olivia is busy squirting lighter fluid onto a pile of wood in the burnpit. An anxious Liz, already back from peeing, watches on. "I think that's-- I think that's enough-- Ms. Bosphorus?" Olivia lights a match and looks Liz in the eyes. "Watch this. ... Bang!" She tosses the match, and the resulting whoompf of flame almost literally blows the two women back. Liz shrieks in fright. Olivia is transfixed, though. Her eyes bulge and she giggles stupidly. Then, turning in a semicricle and calling to you all, she says: "Who wants s'mores?" "Guess you'll have to pitch your tent yourself," you tell Amelia, snrking. She gives you a look. Okay, you deserved that."AAAH! SNAKE! FUCK!" That would be Summer, yelling her goddamn head off, and prancing across the campground like a ballet dancer on hot coals, arms theatrically held aloft and cocked, dashing for the safety of the vehicle. "Summer--" Liz calls. "Hold on-- I need some help with the--""I am going inside and I am STAYING inside. FOREVER," Summer announces. She slams the Winnebago's door shut behind her."Pussy," Winter and K-Mom call, both at the same time.Auburn carefully studies the instruction manual for his tent. But Will is more gung-ho about it: "stop reading, Eggbert. Just help me put this thing together.""Do you know what you're doing?""It's a tent. How hard can it be?" So confident. But moments later, Will is flummoxed, considering two black aluminum poles in one hand and a wad of tarp in his other, unable to reconcile how they will form a free-standing structure. "Brant! Help me already!" He shouts. When Auburn stoically stays in place reading the manual, Will begins to beat him about the head and neck with one of the poles, and they get into a somewhat prissy slapfight.
You survey the campground. It's a sort of cul-de-sac in the wilderness, situated at the end of a little dirt offshoot from the main path which branches to dozens of other campsites. You see, distantly, the firelight of other people camping in the area, and the many human-shaped silhouettes crowding around. Not exactly roughing it a hundred miles from all known civilization. To the south (uhhh -- you think) you can clearly spy the lights of the city of Vail all along the rocky mountain.The campsite has several little dirt patches arrayed around a concrete burnpit -- designated spaces for tents. K-Mom is all industry as she retrieves the tents from the Winnebago's stowage and gets to work on setting them up. First she grabs each canvas bag containing each individual tent and plops them down in the spots where they will go. Then she starts pitching one."Can I help?" Winter asks, a genuine and childlike excitement tinging her voice."Someone should," K-Mom says. "I could use a hand."Winter hops to, and works with K-Mom. It's odd how fast and efficient they are without verbally communicating. Is this the true power of camping?"Liv, help me get ours set up," Amelia says.But Olivia is busy squirting lighter fluid onto a pile of wood in the burnpit. An anxious Liz, already back from peeing, watches on. "I think that's-- I think that's enough-- Ms. Bosphorus?"Olivia lights a match and looks Liz in the eyes. "Watch this. ... Bang!"She tosses the match, and the resulting whoompf of flame almost literally blows the two women back. Liz shrieks in fright. Olivia is transfixed, though. Her eyes bulge and she giggles stupidly. Then, turning in a semicricle and calling to you all, she says: "Who wants s'mores?""Guess you'll have to pitch your tent yourself," you tell Amelia, snrking. She gives you a look. Okay, you deserved that."AAAH! SNAKE! FUCK!"That would be Summer, yelling her goddamn head off, and prancing across the campground like a ballet dancer on hot coals, arms theatrically held aloft and cocked, dashing for the safety of the vehicle."Summer--" Liz calls. "Hold on-- I need some help with the--""I am going inside and I am STAYING inside. FOREVER," Summer announces. She slams the Winnebago's door shut behind her."Pussy," Winter and K-Mom call, both at the same time.Auburn carefully studies the instruction manual for his tent. But Will is more gung-ho about it: "stop reading, Eggbert. Just help me put this thing together.""Do you know what you're doing?""It's a tent. How hard can it be?" So confident. But moments later, Will is flummoxed, considering two black aluminum poles in one hand and a wad of tarp in his other, unable to reconcile how they will form a free-standing structure. "Brant! Help me already!" He shouts. When Auburn stoically stays in place reading the manual, Will begins to beat him about the head and neck with one of the poles, and they get into a somewhat prissy slapfight.
>>4983372Pitching Amelia's tent!This is cute.
>>4983372Ahhh. Maximum cozy vibes.Let's all ignore the fact that Ophie is still god-knows-where and probably in danger
>>4983344>Vail - Elevation 8,150 Ft.AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>4983375Let's also forget that the last time Amber was in Vail she lost an eye and Wesley fucking died.
>>4983378Okay, 1. they brought her back; better even. 2. That was totally Gwen and doesn't count.Belated LETS GO
>>4983359No bulli, promise. Though, it wouldn't be the first time Dark Souls appeared in an FQ post. Heck, I think it even appeared in one of the lewds.
>>4983378I wouldn't mind forgetting the massive fire, myself.
Something bites you on the arm. You swat, and think you miss. Soon the itching starts. Happy day. As your ears finish popping from the gain in elevation, you can hear birdcall (it's night. Go to bed already.) And the buzz of mosquitos (fuckers. You'll kill them all.) And the even louder buzz of cicadas (they're annoying enough in anime. Now, trapped in actual nature, where no quick scene transition will come along to deafen them, they're truly maddening.) ---You're inside the RV again. It's much nicer without the thrum of cicadas in your ears. Plus: A/C. God that feels good. You cool yourself further by tugging repeatedly at your collar. It's so damn muggy outside -- you're sweating like a pig after just a few minutes of it, and this is at night. The daytime is going to be so gross...N-Mom is in the driver's seat. Summer is in the passenger seat."Welcome to the Nature Sucks Club, recruit," N-Mom says. She salutes. "I'm your captain.""Aye aye!" Summer chirps, saluting as well."Aye aye," you glumly echo, and give a listless salute in turn.A pebble tinks against the windshield. K-Mom is gesticulating wildly outside. "Get out here, you lazy shits! Help us set the tents up!" N-Mom responds by sticking out her tongue. Winter, beside K-Mom, ups the ante by sticking out her tongue and pulling at her eyelids. "What an awful little girl," N-Mom says."Tell me about it," Summer mutters.K-Mom swings around to the driver's side window. N-Mom rolls it down. "I'm going into town for supplies," she says. "Unless you want us all to forage for berries and mushrooms in the woods?""I--""That's sarcasm, Kay. I'm being sarcastic. Don't speak.""Do you want Macca's or T Bell?" Summer asks. "You will NOT bring fast food back to this campsite," K-Mom says. "Yeah, well, when I took a poll, the vote was pretty clearly for food of the fast variety," N-Mom says. "Take it up with the other happy campers if you don't like it.""Carl's Jr.?" Summer asks, as if this is the middle-ground between McDonald's and foraged woodland mushrooms. Ever the negotiator, she is."I'm serious!" K-Mom says. "I will flay you both! Now we passed Dick's Sporting Goods about a mile back -- you should be able to find some nice cooking gear there. And some meals you can cook over a campfire -- chicken pot pie, sausage and potatoes--"N-Mom is rolling the window slowly up."NOELLE VIOLETTA KEKI! YOU ROLL THAT WINDOW BACK DOWN RIGHT NOW!" But K-Mom's threats go ignored, and her shouting becomes more and more muted.
>>4983390God I love these bickering gays
>>4983390Every damn time, with these two. I love it.
>>4983390>It's much nicer without the thrum of cicadas in your ears.Absolute shit taste.>A pebble tinks against the windshield. K-Mom is gesticulating wildly outside. "Get out here, you lazy shits! Help us set the tents up!" I've been wanting to see Kay in the wild for YEARS. What an event.
N-Mom swivels in her seat to regard you. "Mickey D or Taco B?" "On top of everything else going on, I'd prefer not to have diarrhea too," you say."Carl's Jr.," Summer says. "Gotcha.""Are you coming?" N-Mom asks. "Or do you want to placate the less cool Mom by building tents with her.""I--""I won't be mad," N-Mom adds.You fold your arms. "Uh huh. Actually you'd be pretty damn happy, I bet. Getting some alone time with my girlfriend."Summer grins at you from ear to ear."What about Talia?" You ask, jerking your head in the direction of the bathroom."She'll come out of there when she's ready," N-Mom says. "In the meantime, we could all use something to eat.""Yeah," Summer agrees. "We really, really want to eat."(She doesn't have to make it so goddamn obvious by stroking N-Mom's leg at the same time. Jesus.)[ ] Stay and help the girls pitch some tents.[ ] Get something good to eat with N-Mom and Summer.
>>4983401oh god dammit>[x] Stay and help the girls pitch some tentsHow dare you make me pick between these two?
>>4983401God, fuck, etc.This is a tough choice, so before I make it - hey! Here's this, finally updated after so long! This goddamn chart will be the death of me!Vote responsibly, lads. And as usual, let me know if I forgot anything.
>>4983401>[ ] Stay and help the girls pitch some tents.Priorities: be eaten now, eat later.
>>4983401>[ ] Stay and help the girls pitch some tents.>[ ] Bite Summer on the ear on the way outIt is important to maintain the pecking order.
>>4983401Thinking more on it, I think I'm gonna go with>[x] Get something good to eat with N-Mom and Summer.But I'll be happy either way.
>>4983401>[ ] Get something good to eat with N-Mom and Summer.Snuggy Bear worry.Also, all the bug spray.
>>4983401Get something good to eat.
>[x] Get something good to eat with N-Mom and Summer.Please wait warmly.
>>4983438For me, it's the McOyakodon
>>4983583For me, it's the Doublemeat Medley. Double Meat is Double Sweet!
>>4983623Let's fuckin gooooo
>>4983623oh boy oh boy oh girl
>>4983623A NEW CHALLENGER APPROACHESOP you're a goddamn madman
>>4983623good lord OP, what the hell are you up to this time
You all eat Taco Bell around the campfire. And you know what? K-Mom was right. This feels wrong. But bitch as she might, K-Mom herself is eating too, having snagged one of the protein bowls. N-Mom noshes a crunchwrap supreme beside her. As usual after having her brains screwed out, Summer is especially clingy, and keeps herself wrapped around you like a blanket, nuzzling and snuggling with you. Sure, she might go to N-Mom for some carnal pleasure, but it's always you she comes back to for intimacy."You girls are just perfect for each other," Liz says. "You're so cute together."Winter makes gagging noises."Stop," Liz chides.Winter, barefoot, kicks Summer in the shins -- not hard, but not playfully, either. Summer sticks her tongue out at her, and then goes back to nuzzling you."Are those wedding bells I hear?" Liz says."Oh god no," Winter says pleadingly.After a healthy application of bug repellent and the tireless work of Will and Lily to set up some bug zappers, you're relatively mosquito-free... but every once in a while one of the fuckers finds a path to you and bites you anyway. Those absolute cunts. How can you be of assistance in driving them to extinction? You will make this your life's mission. No joke.Amber chews the handle of a plastic spork until it has a fine-tipped point and then tries to jimmy open the lock of her handcuffs."You won't succeed," Aunt Vivian warns her."Yes I will," Amber says, staring down at her manacled wrist in her lap and her ad hoc attempt at lockpicking. "Fucking bet."Vivian shakes her head in bemused resignation.
"All right," Olivia says. "I've got something in mind! Ask away!"Amelia blows a raspberry in the air. She isn't as into the game as Olivia is, clearly -- but she'll placate her girlfriend. "All right. Is it bigger than a breadbox?""Ummmmm." Amelia already knows this is going to be frustrating, but she can't help being amused at it, all the same. She smiles in a beleaguered sort of way."How big is a breadbox?" Olivia asks.This puts Amelia on the back foot. She actually isn't sure. "I -- I guess it would be just a little bigger than a loaf of bread. One assumes."Olivia nods. "How big is a loaf of bread?"Now Amelia is actively annoyed. "Come on, Liv. You know how big a loaf of bread is--""Loaves come in many sizes! I need to know exactly what you're picturing when you picture a generic loaf of bread! This is absolutely critical to my answer!"Amelia, slumping her shoulders, traces the outline of an invisible rectangular prism in the air. Olivia watches intently. "No," she says at last."No what?""No to your question.""What!""No!! It's NOT bigger than a breadbox! It's just a little smaller.""My goodness," Amelia sighs. "Okay... well... is it something living?"Olivia blinks, once, twice. "Mmmmmmmaybe."Amelia closes her eyes and seems to be saying a silent prayer for death. When she opens her eyes again, she asks: "is it part of something living?""Yes!"Amelia recoils slightly. She doesn't like where this has gone and she's hesitant as she asks, "is it... a part of me?"Olivia claps, delighted. "You're so close!""Oh god," Amelia moans.
>>4983657Jesus christ, Olivia, calm down. Keep going.
"You can see, like... every single star," Lily marvels, halfway reposing on her elbows. "Pictures don't do it justice, do they... this is gorgeous."Olivia gets down beside Lily. "I can teach you the constellations. Do you know your star sign? Wait! Let me guess! ... Scorpio, right?""Uh -- yeah."Olivia points so Lily can see her finger. "Look over here. See? That group of stars is Scorpius. Do you see the scorpion?" She traces the invisible lines between them. You couldn't possibly care less about bullshit like the Zodiac, but Lily is interested."Yeah. I think I see it.""Really see it," Olivia says. "See it with your mind's eye." She keeps twirling her finger around and around, tracing the scorpion again and again. It seems to have an almost hypnotic effect on Lily. "Ooh, do me!" Will says. He plops down beside them. Lily startles and gives him a mean look, but he doesn't notice. "I'm Aries.""Hmm," Olivia murmurs. "Aries isn't visible in the night sky just yet. Sorry. You'll have to wait a couple months.""Aw," Will says, genuinely bummed.Lily dusts her elbows off and sits upright again. "Where you sleeping?" She asks."Whuh?" You say, somehow surprised to find she's asking you."Everybody claimed a tent while you were out at T Bell. Which one you sneaking into?" Lily points from tent to tent. "Your Moms are in the first one there. Then you have Tenta Denali. Then in the middle tent there are Liv and Mel, then Will and Auburn, and lastly you got Amber and Vivian. They're letting me bunk with them.""Aren't we nice..." Amber mutters. Obviously this decision wasn't hers."Where's Talia sleeping?" you ask.Lily shrugs. "In the toilet, I guess."You sigh.[ ] You're a mama's girl. Sleep with the Moms.[ ] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.[ ] Spent some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers.[ ] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.[ ] Your aunt should be kind enough to invite you in, too. Sleep with Amber, Lily, and Vivian.
>>4983663>[x] Amber, Lily, and Vivianaaaaa etc
"You can see, like... every single star," Lily marvels, halfway reposing on her elbows. "Pictures don't do it justice, do they... this is gorgeous."Olivia gets down beside Lily. "I can teach you the constellations. Do you know your star sign? Wait! Let me guess! ... Scorpio, right?""Uh -- yeah."Olivia points so Lily can see her finger. "Look over here. See? That group of stars is Scorpius. Do you see the scorpion?" She traces the invisible lines between them. You couldn't possibly care less about bullshit like the Zodiac, but Lily is interested."Yeah. I think I see it.""Really see it," Olivia says. "See it with your mind's eye." She keeps twirling her finger around and around, tracing the scorpion again and again. It seems to have an almost hypnotic effect on Lily."Ooh, do me!" Will says. He plops down beside them. Lily startles and gives him a mean look, but he doesn't notice. "I'm Aries.""Hmm," Olivia murmurs. "Aries isn't visible in the night sky just yet. Sorry. You'll have to wait a couple months.""Aw," Will says, genuinely bummed.Lily dusts her elbows off and sits upright again. "Where you sleeping?" She asks."Whuh?" You say, somehow surprised to find she's asking you."Everybody claimed a tent while you were out at T Bell. Which one you sneaking into?" Lily points from tent to tent. "Your Moms are in the first one there. Then you have Tenta Denali. Then in the middle tent there are Liv and Mel, then Will and Auburn, and lastly you got Amber and Vivian. They're letting me bunk with them.""Aren't we nice..." Amber mutters, still trying to pry open the handcuffs. Obviously this decision wasn't hers."Where's Talia sleeping?" you ask.Lily shrugs. "In the toilet, I guess."You sigh.[ ] You're a mama's girl. Sleep with the Moms.[ ] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.[ ] Spend some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers.[ ] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.[ ] Your aunt should be kind enough to invite you in, too. Sleep with Amber, Lily, and Vivian.
That'll be all for tonight. I'll let the vote commence and pick up Sunday evening.
>>4983666>>4983667Vote unchanged!>>4983669Thanks for the run as always, OP-sama!
>>4983657Fucking lol>>4983667>[x] Spend some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers.Hard to tell which of these options is the most dangerous, but this is definitely a contender.
>>4983669Thank you for the run, OP. I'll look forward to it!>[X] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.This seems fun, and almost totally wholesome. Bickering with the boys!
>>4983667>[x] Spend some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers.Amelia.
>>4983667>[ X] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.Oyakodon, OYAKODON 親子丼!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>4983667[X] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.I'm morbidly curious as to where this will lead. If I'm the only vote for this, just put me down for Tenta Denali if we need a tiebreaker.
>>4983667>[ ] Spend some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers.Just feels right.
>>4983667>[ ] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.Will Winter join in? Or will it be awkward and she'll end up going to the BRB couple's tent?Either way, it's a win.
>>4983667>[x] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.
>>4983667>[ ] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.Just some men being fren
>3-way tie between the lesbo bookkeepers, the Boys, and the Denalis
>>4983667>[ ] You're a mama's girl. Sleep with the MomMommy time.
>>4984166>>4984156Shit, you're right.Change to[ ] Spend some quality time with the lesbo bookeepers
>>4983667>[ ] Get to know the future in-laws. Tenta Denali it is.Summer isn't the only motherfucker in this camp
>>4983667>[x] You're a mama's girl. Sleep with the Moms.I need more keki
>>4983667>[x] Nothing wrong about hanging out with the guys. Sleep in Will and Auburn's tent.Fuck it.
Uhhhh, tie vote.
>>4984703Good lord you guys.
When everyone pairs (or trios) off to head for their tents for the evening, you make the obvious choice of lodging with the Moms. Where the hell else would you sleep? You unfurl your sleeping back on one side of the tent, and they unfurl theirs on their side. They're sharing a single sleeping bag -- it's big enough for two, but still, the idea kinda wigs you out. Being trapped inside a sleeping bag with anyone, even your spouse, just seems so claustrophobic. None of you tuck in, though. You keep a lantern burning on the ground between you and check the news out of Palo Alto."Storm's not clearing out," K-Mom says, watching the Doppler radar on her phone. "They're saying it'll last about a week. Economic damage in the tens of billions...""Think our house is still gonna be standing?" You ask.K-Mom shrugs. "Worse comes to worse, we can move to Vegas. You know the one thing you'll never hear about Vegas? 'It rained too much.'" "That's literally not true," N-Mom says. "Didn't your dad's car get wrecked in a flash flood?""He tried to drive through a puddle! Lo and behold it was too deep, and his car got totaled. A totally preventable misfortune that he brought upon himself. Like the rest of his life.""Hey, is Ophie all right?" You ask, cutting through an incipient bitch-off. "Those Instrumentalist freaks think she's important, too. Shouldn't she be here with us?"The Moms are silent for a turn. N-Mom finally offers, "I'm sure she's with Alabaster right about now. Total daddy's girl, right? He'll keep her safe."You nod. There's another and much longer silence. And at last, all you can say to break it is, "this sucks.""Wanna see Guy?" K-Mom asks.You shrug by way of saying -- sure.
"Masters!" Samantha shouts when the facetime call goes through. Behind her, you can see the backdrop of Alex Best's swanky condo in downtown Palo -- high and dry... save for the roaring howl of pouring rain against the all-glass walls. "Hey Sam," K-Mom says. "Holding down the fort?""Mmhmm!""Still raining pretty hard over there, huh.""It's coming down in sheets. Oh my gosh. It's really scary. But Master Alex and Master Sable have been keeping me such good company too! And of course--" Samantha turns and makes a series of puckery kisses and little coos and patters her palms against her lap, until Guy's grey form comes running. She has to help the poor girl up into the chair, given her advanced age, but she's as peppy as ever. Samantha holds Guy up for you all to see her face. "Our favorite little Guy! Who's our favorite little Guy? Is it you? Is it? Yes it is! Oh yes it is! Mwah mwah mwah." She kisses the side of its face repeatedly while still peering into the camera's lens."You're not making too much of a mess for Alex, I hope," K-Mom says, a remark obviously directed at Guy -- but Samantha, growing somewhat frightened, shakes her head and emphatically says "oh, no! I'm being a considerate guest okay!"K-Mom decides not to explain, and instead reassures Samantha: "Of course you are. I don't think they could ask for any better guest than you." (Samantha's smile of relief is both heartwarming and heart-rending.) "And thanks for helping to sit Guy. You're a lifesaver. Pass my thanks to Alex and Sable too.""Yes!""Where are they? You ask."They're h... asleep," Samantha says. You cock your head."Okay I have to go water Frank! Goodbye! Have fun camping!" And with that Samantha hangs up."Who the hell is Frank?" N-Mom asks, blinking."Sable's ficus," K-Mom explains."She named her ficus? She named it Frank?" N-Mom shakes her head in disbelief. "Jesus, that woman."
"Why was Sam so..." you begin, but can't put it into words. "Should we call Dad?" "I don't think he's awake yet," N-Mom says. "Let's try him in the morning. It's been such a long day already."You can't shake the feeling you're being stalled. But you're tired, it's true -- tired down to your core, tired in your bones, so tired you're almost dizzy, and the weight of your eyelids is too much to ignore any longer. You start to settle into your sleeping bag."You know we love you, right?" K-Mom says all at once.You roll over, face them. "What? Well -- yeah.""That's good," N-Mom says. "Because we do. We really, really do.""If we lost you..." K-Mom says, "it would be like... losing the light. I think we'd shrivel up and die."You nod. The words "I love you" have such cheap currency in a healthy relationship between parent and child, that sometimes you don't really grasp the meaning behind them. But here and now, you sort of do. "That being said, please get out," N-Mom says. "...What.""Go sleep with your girlfriend tonight.""You--""What your mother is saying is that we need some privacy," K-Mom explains. "You don't want to stick around in here with us unless you want to watch your parents hav--" she pauses, and then drops that line of reasoning. "Well, we're going to be bumping uglies now, just the two of us -- quality wife time. And I'm sure you'll be fine bunking with Summer tonight."You leave the tent with your sleeping bag under your arm, grumbling and mumbling the whole way. Just where do they get off? Err--
>>4984810>mommy timeYessssssssss>>4984818>get outFuck.
You approach Tenta Denali (as it's been so Christened). But pausing at the zippered entrance, you're unsure how to proceed. How do you knock on a tent door? You try batting at it with an open palm a couple times, which does make a little noise. But you suppose it would be easily mistaken for a gust of wind, if the girls inside even heard it at all. So instead of simulating a door-knock, you try scratching instead. The squeal of your fingernails on the nylon tarp is loud, attention-grabbing, and unmistakably anthropogenic. "What is that?" You hear a hissed voice from within, probably Liz's."Oh shit -- Mom, look, look at the shadow," comes a harried reply, also hissed, but definitely Summer. "It's a-- fuck, it's a bear! Fuck! FUCK!""It's probably a black bear," Winter says, not whispering, and not scared. "We just gotta make a lot of noise to scare it off.""Winter-- Winter!!" Liz hisses."Let go of me-- hey-- YO, BEAR! GET LOST!""Oh god... Winter, Summer, get in the back of the tent -- go, get under the covers-- I'll get the gun--""Liz-- hey-- YO BEAR! GO AWAY!""Winter! Stop!""Uh," you say meekly. "I'm -- not... a bear."There's a long silence on the other side."Wes?" Summer's voice calls out, no longer whispering."Hi," you say.Summer unzips the tent just enough to poke her head out through a tiny hole in the material. The whites of her eyes gleam in the moonlight, the rest of her face dark and severe. "What the hell are you doing! Why are you scratching at our tent like a fucking serial killer! Are you an idiot?""Yeah."Summer shakes her head. "Well, what do you want?""Can I sleep with you tonight?" You ask.Summer steps aside, the door unzipped and fully open, before you finish saying the word "tonight."
>>4984810u r 1 cheeky cunt m8 i swer>>4984816Cute!>>4984818Oh boy, here we go.
Ahhh, loving these vibes.>>4984839Lmao. Good job Wes.
I'm involved in writing something cute and wholesome and lewd that won't be finished tonight. I'll work on it some more though and hopefully get it posted Monday as we explore the Mystery of the Three Tents.
>>4984891With a threeway tie, I'm not the least bit surprised. Godspeed.
>>4984891Eep! Looking forward to it!
>>4984891Sorry we fucked you again OP Studios
>>4984891For a second, I honestly thought Wesley's gonna get blue beaned for the entire night, which would be hilarious in a way.
>>4984891Thank you for the work, OP!>Legends of the Hidden Tent-Pole>Wesleyana Keki and the Fabric Fortress of Friendly Frotage
>>4983623>You lean through the open window. "Yeah. I'll take a uhhhh...">"FUCK, NOELLEY-BELLY! I'M FUCKING CUMMING AGAIN!"My poor sides, damn you OP.
Just caught up, looking forward to more Labor Day YuruCamp shenanigans tonight.Can’t believe it took me that long to recognize Aoi Asahina as Amelia, hope we get to see more of her tonight since it’s fitting.
>>4985640Aoi Asahina is the delicious brown girl from Danganronpa, anon
>>4985666Fuck, Aoi Inuyama, my b. Gonna go commit sudoku now because I have her nendoroid coming in the mail next month too…
>>4984816Interesting that the Instrumentalists don't appear to be bothering Alex and Sable. They were essential to the creation of the previous universe's Sand Reckoner. Then again, if they know about that; they know of some of his other feats and are keeping their distance.
>>4984891Those are my three favourite words! Good things come in threes, like tents.
>>4984818>You nod. The words "I love you" have such cheap currency in a healthy relationship between parent and child, that sometimes you don't really grasp the meaning behind them. But here and now, you sort of do.Family being an obvious theme of this season, this reminded me of a flashback between Vivian and David from season 3:>"Father, do you... do you love me?">David tilts his head and peers down at his daughter, confused. "Why would you think I don't?">But tears are slowly trickling down her cheeks, so he hugs her tight, and says (one of maybe a dozen or so times he ever directly does) -- "I love you, Vivian."
>>4983623>"Vacation?" A short, flat, peppy blonde girl in a visor and too-thick mascara asks by way of breaking the ice.>"Yeah.">"Seems like you're having fun," she says.Can't wait for this one to become a recurring character, too. She sounds like she'll be a blast.
>>4986918>try to think of potential names for our new Taco Bell girl>first thing that comes to mind is Belleit's brain poison, I tells ya
>>4986921So you're saying if N-mom sinks her claws into her too, it'll be Noelley-Belley?
Should we tell Vivian about David's cancer? Or Nelson about Talia and Sam?
>>4988870OP is currently on a pilgrimage to solve the mysteries of the three tents. Please understand.
Is tonight the night?
>>4992884I reckon so
Hello friends. I'm sorry for my lack of updates. Same stuff I alluded to before. Writer's block. The usual. I will post the promised lewd (finally) on Sunday night/early Monday morning, and then continue with this episode on Saturday 9/18. Announcements to come on Twitter also.
>>4993116I hope your ganbatte-ry is charged!We'll look forward to it--but take your time!!
"You know we're only going to be here for a few days, right?" You say."And why not live them in comfort?" Liz says.Fair cop. But furnishing their tent with a wall-to-wall throw rug, hammocks, inflatable sofa, beanbag chairs, tablet tripod mount and speaker system to simulate a home entertainment center, telescoping lamps, and a kotatsu in place of a coffee table is... kind of overkill, in your opinion. The kind of thing K-mom witheringly calls glamping. Benefits of being a family of furniture (& flooring) magnates. You can't deny that it makes their tent so much more inviting than the positively spartan setup the Moms have got. Maybe you'll make this your home base from here on out. Liz has her tablet displaying the same Doppler radar K-Mom was monitoring. The radar shows all of north-central Cali bathed in a gyre of neon flamingo. This is the color it defaults to when green, yellow, and red don't properly cut it for depicting the severity of the rainfall. "Our house is in a relatively low-lying area," Liz says, watching along with you. "I don't know if we'll have anything to come back to when this is all over.""You can stay with us," you say, a convulsion of charity gripping you."I can shoot myself in the head, too," Winter says, settling in on one of the hammocks. "Doesn't mean I will.Looking from Denali to Denali, only then do you realize that they're wearing matching pajamas: baggy button-up tops and elastic trousers, all made from carnation pink silk. Liz and Summer look right at home in these nightclothes, but Winter is visibly uncomfortable. She keeps tugging at the collar and she has her shirt's bottom buttons undone past her navel.Liz plays the diplomat. "That's very sweet of you, Wes, but I have to wonder how your mothers would feel about it.""I'm sure they'd be just fine with it," you say. Maybe trying to convince yourself more than anyone."Noelle would be for sure," Summer says. Then, winking, "I'm working on Kay.""Kay likes me better.""Shut up, Winter!""Make me!"Summer's whipping hair follows her whipping head at a lag, as she turns your way, smiling frustratedly. "I can kick her out if you want. Do you want me to kick her out?""Try it, biatch," Winter calls. "You wanna get slapped, Winter? I'll fucking do it!""Girls..." Liz murmurs. "If you keep acting like this, I'll kick you both out.""Fine with me," Summer says. "I'll just go sleep with Noelle-bell." "Let's stay here," you cut in.
You lay your sleeping bag down in an open spot near the kotatsu. "Whoa! Hey! Excuse you?" Summer says, balled up fists on her waistband."What?" She gives the sleeping bag a light kick with her bare foot, rolling it over itself. "A? It's barely past 2 AM. Secondly? Don't you want to sleep with me?"You frown. "Firstly? This has been the craziest day of my entire life. I'm tired. B? The idea of sharing a sleeping bag between two people gives me the wiggins. For real.""I'm not using a sleeping bag," Summer says, as if you suggested she was a satanist. She turns in a circle, indicating what in retrospect should have been obvious: "we're using hammocks. See the hammocks, babe? You didn't cum so hard that you went blind, did you?" Liz coughs, and looks away, and pretends she didn't hear."Fine. How are we supposed to share a hammock?" You demand -- the practical question."First I get in..." She lies down on her hammock. Pats her tummy. "Then you get on top of me.""God," Winter says. Although maybe not entirely out of disgust."How much do you weigh?" You ask.Summer's expression goes from steamy to steamed. "You can't just ask a girl something like that! Geez..." She squeezes that tummy of hers she was so recently petting, stares at it. "Why do you want to know? ... Do I look fat to you? Am I getting too fat? Oh god. I'm getting fat, and now you don't think I'm cute enough--""Og my God. You're fine. I just want to know if that shitty Ikea knockoff can support our combined weight...""It's not an Ikea knockoff!" Liz says. "And for your information, those hammocks can support up to 300 pounds.""Better not try your luck, then," Winter says."You little shit!" Summer yells, tossing a pillow at her. "How about a game before bed?" Liz asks. She sits down at the kotatsu. "Come on, y'all. It'll be fun."You sigh deeply. You just want to close your eyes and go to sleep already... but Summer and Winter both go and sit at the kotatsu as well, so what can you do? (Well, if you were more assertive, you could beg off and lie down by yourself. But you're not more assertive. So.)You settle beside Summer, and directly across from Winter. Strange to think, but this is the first time you've ever sat at a kotatsu. With your legs under the futon, you feel an overpowering warmth from the electric coil there, multiplied by being squeezed in so closely with Summer and her more than ample natural body heat.
>>4994755oh boy here we go>>4994759>the wigginsExtra large heh.
"Do you like?" Liz asks, petting the fine grain wood of the tabletop. "This is a type of furniture common in Japan. It's called a kotatsu." "I bet she knew that," Summer says. "She watches Japanese cartoons like it's her job. These things are all over the place in them." You nod."Nerrrrrd," Winter says.Liz smiles. "Well I think it's just great that you take the time to appreciate other cultures. I'm always looking at what's popular around the world. Stocking exotic items is just good business... so? Is it as comfy as the cartoons say?""It's nice.""Nice! Nice? Just feel this fabric. That's 2,000 thread count Egyptian cotton you're sitting under. With extra-thick batting, and seamless stitches. You don't get craftsmanship like this anywhere. I vet my suppliers, thoroughly. There's a ten-point inspection checklist I--"Summer cuts in. "Mom. C'mon. Don't talk shop."Liz stops fiddling with the futon's fabric. "Fine. I can summarize it simply enough. It's the squish you can't resist! -- Right?""Right--" you agree, and then stifle a gasp as, under the futon, Liz squeezes your upper thigh. That was a sororal gesture more than a seductive one, you're pretty sure... 90% sure... but it came so unexpectedly that it leaves your heart thudding. Maybe you're just a hopeless pervert."So what's the game, huh, ma?" Winter says. "Poker," she says with a sly smile. She unzips a little travel case and produces multicolored stacks of poker chips and a deck of cards. Oh god."What kind of poker?" Winter wants to know."Hold 'em is pretty standard," Liz says. "Although if you girls want to learn Omaha Hi-Low or Razz, I'm happy to teach you.""No thanks," Summer says.Winter can't resist a chance to disagree with her sister. "I like Razz. We should play Razz."Liz squints. "How do you -- did your father teach you?" Winter nods."Of course... well, I hope he only ever used funny money with you."Winter laughs. "With me? Sure. But he ran a weekly back-room poker game when we were up in Nome for a couple years. Mostly they played Razz and Hold 'em. I served drinks to the other players and helped Dad cheat by telling him their cards. He gave me 10% of the profit..."Liz looks positively horrified at this revelation. "When you were in Nome? But you were only about 10 back then--""Yup.""I am going to kill that man," Liz murmurs. "Just deal," Summer says, obviously annoyed -- rare moment of taking Winter's side of things? "We can just play Hold 'em. It's easy." Then, glancing Winter's way: "You try to cheat me, and I'll kick your butt.""You're the card cheat here," Winter says. Summer has no retort to that.
Liz passes you all $1500 worth of chips and sets the ante to $100. She shuffles and deals."No blinds?" Winter asks as she takes her cards and checks them."I don't want to make it too complicated. This is a friendly game.""Pot limits?""Winter. This isn't a serious game. We're just playing and chatting. No limits.""Ok," Winter chirps. "I'm all-in." She shoves her entire pile of chips into the center of the table."Goddamn it," Summer says. "What's wrong? Too chicken to call?" Summer seems to really consider it -- Winter's good at getting under her skin. But she folds after a moment of thought. Liz folds, too, and seems almost as pissed as Summer. Winter tilts her head. "Looks like it's just you and me, Wesley.""Uh huh." You glance at your cards, raising just the corner so you can see. Seven-deuce off-suit. Summer takes a peek too. And when you fail to immediately fold such a shitty deal, she nudges you. "Wes... you do know that's a bad hand, right?""Yeah. But if I lose, I get to go to bed. And if I win..." you trail off and glance across the table at Winter. "Call," you say.You shove your chips. Instead of being chastened, Winter cackles in glee, and when you both turn your cards face-up, you see why. She wasn't bluffing. She has a pair of black kings. Summer massages her face. "I told you... idiot.""You're just too easy," Winter tells you. "Sometimes I think you like losing.""Just get it over with," you tell Liz. She deals the flop, the turn, and the river. The cards come up in perfect order: 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 of diamonds. A straight flush. "You have got to be kidding me--" Winter says."Looks like you just cheated death," Liz tells you.Winter's smile and optimism: gone. The pot gets split, which means you each walk away with a measly $100 gain -- the antes that Summer and Liz contributed to the pot. This unexpected good fortune has prolonged the time you have before you can sleep, which sucks, but you smile to yourself at shutting Winter up. Now she's sullen and pouty. Less obnoxious that way. Cuter too."You really are your father's daughter," Liz tells her. "Gideon used to get so mad when I would luck out against him. What is it that he used to tell me..." She turns and winks at you. "You must have been born with a horseshoe up your ass."You sputter."Pardon the French," Liz pleads in faux contrition, laughing.
>>4994759>"And for your information, those hammocks can support up to 300 pounds.">"Better not try your luck, then," Winter says.Damn, Winter's got no chill.
>>4994755>"You know we're only going to be here for a few days, right?" You say.Suuuure, Wes. Sure. We know how these holidays go.>>4994788Nuoh god oh fuckGood shit, OP. Good shit.
>>4994788This was a fun one. Thanks, OP.
>>4994788They'll never getting the smell out of that kotetsu.
>>4994788We have begun the path to something most have only dreamed of.Thank you for pulling through, OP. I haven't been able to be live lately, but I always look forward to it.
>>4994755"Fine with me," Summer says. "I'll just go sleep with Noelle-bell."Summer is getting on my nerves.
>>4997421Honestly inclined to agree here. We've gotta rein them both in at this point.
>>4997421Tie her up and throw her in Mel's tent.
>>4998268We need to introduce Liz to Amelia too.
>>5000009Oh good grief, and they've nominated Whitney too, the absolute madmen.
>>5000103>>5000586Better go vote now!
"Summer..." Liz says. "You're so..." "So?" Summer prods. Liz pushes her thick legs together and swallows hard. "You're so..."You pet Winter's head as she nuzzles your thigh. Meanwhile you yourself nuzzle Summer's chest. Liz watches this post-coitus affection mutely."How about we--" you begin. But there's noise from outside, the harsh squeak of a zipper, and without warning there's someone entering the tent. You aren't the only one caught off-guard. Liz bodily jerks like she's been tazed. Winter pulls away from you so fast that she whangs her skull on the underside of the kotatsu, jostling the cards and poker chips. Summer hardly manages to cover her chest with her pajama top in time. You don't match that speed, and have to sit mortifyingly pantsless under cover of the futon."Ah -- glad you're all still up. How's camp?" He looks from face to stunned face.Liz is first to find her words. "Gideon... why are you here?"Winter was momentarily shocked frozen, but Liz saying Gideon's name seems to have broken the spell. Her head disappears beneath the kotatsu and you hear the frantic rustle of her donning her pajama bottoms again. Then she pops out on the other side, hopping to her feet. "Daddy!"She runs up and hugs him around the midsection. He clasps the back of her head, smiling, and holds her close. "How's my cuddles?"Winter blushes, blinks rapidly. "D-don't--""Hmm?" Gideon says. "Oh... I see. You don't want me to call you Cuddles in front of your cool new friend here.""Dad--"(While Gideon is distracted, you surreptitiously put your shorts back on under the futon. You hope it's not too conspicuous, the way you prop yourself awkwardly onto one hand and slip the elastic past your butt before settling again.)
Gideon chuckles as Winter, struggling against his strength, extricates herself from his grip. The good spirit dies when he sees that the other two Denali girls are much less enthusiastic about his presence. "Wow," he says, trying to salvage things, "you're so tall these days, Summer. If you hit another growth spurt, you'll overtake me."Summer huffs."I know you love softball, but have you ever considered basketball? You'd--""Seriously. What are you doing here?" Summer says.Gideon can't hide his hurt expression. He actually flinches. But Summer wants an answer, so he gives it. "Executive decision. The rest of the brain trust is back in Palo yet. But we figured you could use some protection, and agreed I'd be the best point man in this neck of the woods.""Why?" Liz asks."We didn't find Buridan. If we're lucky, he bled out and his body'll turn up in a storm drain somewhere. Do you think we're that lucky? I don't think we're that lucky. His next move might be to come after you. And since I know him best..." he coughs, and pulls out a cigarette. "Do you mind if I smoke in here?""Yes, I mind," Liz says, standing, snatching it from him. He grumbles. "What happened to quitting?""Still at it," he says. "Smoking is the easiest thing in the world to quit. I've done it about 20 times now." "Mark Twain..." you say.Gideon is pleasantly surprised. "Yes. Mark Twain. Paraphrased, anyway.""Think you can come walking in here and have a place to sleep?" Summer says. "Stop it!" Winter says, with bitterness to match her sister's. "Of course you can sleep here. We'll set up a blanket on the rug for you."But Liz shoots her down. "I don't think that's a good idea.""What!" Winter screams. She motions angrily at Liz. "Oh, so you're just gonna kick him out again. Is that it?""I'll be fine," Gideon tells her. "I brought my own tent. I just wanted to let you guys know that I'd be here so you didn't wake up to a surprise in the morning."Winter spins around. From so close she has to crane her neck to look him in the eyes. "I'll sleep in your tent then. I... I missed you... hey, we can play cribbage, it's been a while -- and --""Why don't you hang out in here with your mom and sister."Winter's voice is pure venom. "She isn't my mom."Summer begins to say something in turn, but Gideon intercedes before things can get ugly. "Yes. She is. And she loves you every bit as much as I do." He rubs her upper arm. "We can do stuff together in the morning, Cuddles, okay?""But Daddy..."Gideon glances back at Liz, and you can tell he's hoping that there will be some change of heart. But Liz doesn't bend, and responds with a mute glare.[ ] Speak up on Gideon's behalf, and argue for him to sleep in their tent.[ ] Don't interfere in Denali family business.
>>5001562>[x]Don't interfere in Denali family businessPlaces to be, after all...
>>5001547Fucks sake, not this guy again>>5001562>[X] Don't interfere in Denali family business.You're still suffering the ramifications of pointing a gun at my girl's head, fucko
Despite their efforts to bail the water, Ophie and Noah's boat sinks out from under them just as they row past the parking lot at KDOW. So they wade through waist-high, garbage-clogged and filthy water towards the front entrance, and luckily find it propped open. Inside, they find a lobby half watterlogged, with furniture bobbing around, ferns and chairs and a little table. The going is slow, and tiring, but at least they're out of the downpour."Ophelia... your skirt."Ophie glances down. In the water, her skirt has billowed up all around her, leaving her immodestly exposed. But she doesn't care at all, and presses onward.They make it to a stairwell, and trudge upstairs towards the second story, where they find the soundbooth -- predictably abandoned. The power starts to flicker, the station's low hung amber lights cutting in and out of service for long intervals. They both stare up at them in silence.Comfortable enough with one another that they can dispense with their customary shyness, they take off their clothes, and wring them out on the carpet outside the control room. Ophie shakes her hair, looking like a metalhead for a moment, spattering the windows of the control room with millions of droplets. Noah does likewise.Ophie spits the foul-tasting dregs of rainwater from off her lips: "Pfffthtthppfff." She wipes her face with a palm, but it's not clear that she removed more moisture than she added. She finds a phone mounted to the wall, picks up the receiver, puts it to her ear, listens a moment, and then sets it back in the cradle."What should we do?" Noah asks."There is little of use we can do at the moment," is her deadpanned assessment. She leaves her clothes on the floor, crosses the room and stands at a window overlooking the bay. But her view is obscured by the dark and the downpour. "This is an ARkStorm."Noah's view, behind her, is much nicer. He takes full advantage. So he's a little slower to process things than normal, but he does at last turn back to the practical. "Should we try to go further down the road? There were some more buildings on the distance. Taller ones.""Facebook," Ophie says. "This water is too deep to travel. If the tides turn, we could get carried out to sea.""We could go to the roof... try to flag down help.""And who do you think is out in this weather?" Ophie asks, still watching out the window. "No aircraft can fly. We have nothing like signal flares, and no one on the ground will see us. Going to the roof is only going to get us wet again.""The water will keep rising... who knows when the storm will clear." "We can cling to the station's mast if it comes to that. We should be safe inside at least until sunup.""Which brings me back to the first question. What do we do now?""You're staring at me," Ophie says.Noah stammers. "W-what? -- I'm--"Ophie turns around. "Just because there is little of use we can do... does not mean there is nothing at all we can do."
[x] Don't interfere in Denali family business.Gideon stoops and steps out of the tent. There's a long, tense, and awkward silence in his wake."Sooo..." you drawl. "You guys wanna fuck some more, or?""No," all three Denalis say at once."Right."Summer settles in on a hammock. "Come on, stupid. Let's get some sleep.""Actually, I think we should have a family meeting," Liz says. She meets your gaze. "Are you all right going back to sleep with your mothers, honey?""Oh sure," you lie. She doesn't need to know that the Moms are currently up to each other's noses in each other's pussies."Sorry to be kicking you out," Liz says. "We can pick up our game tomorrow sometime.""Aww," Summer says. "I wanted to be Wes's pillow tonight."As nice as it sounds, you figure these three have a lot to work through, so you leave them to it.
You step out into the humid night. The last embers of the fire are enough to see Auburn's pale face by his tent. He's sitting on a boulder, facing the woods. He rises to his feet when he hears another person out here. Seeing you, he's visibly disappointed."Wesley," he says, trying to be cordial. "Trouble sleeping?" You ask."Will doesn't make the world's best tentmate, let's say."You draw closer. From inside their tent comes the jet engine noise of Will's snoring. You nod in sympathy. "Seems like you were waiting for something, though.""Amber said if she got loose of those handcuffs, she'd come see me.""You?" You laugh. "Why?""Do you really want to know all the sordid details of your own sister's sex life?" Auburn counters. You let that remark hang among the sounds of chirping crickets and snoring Wills. Auburn takes this as ceding the point: "that's what I thought.""Must be feeling pretty... blue, then," you say with a smirk."You caught me in a bad mood, Wes. I'd watch your mouth if I were you. Unless you intend to use it." There's a palpable silence again between you, as you consider that -- and the mood shifts, as Auburn realizes that his crude joke is being given some sort of consideration.Although the idea of sinking to your knees and giving a BJ in the middle of the campground does, in theory, turn you on -- the fact that it would be with Auburn keeps you from following through. The moment passes, and Auburn brushes by. He wanders over to the dying fire. With his back to you, he seems to be intently watching the pile of charcoal, ash, and cherries. "Mad she stood you up?" You ask."She didn't stand me up. Her psychotic aunt is keeping her chained down like Cinderella.""Oh, and I guess you're Prince Charming in this scenario," you laugh. Auburn doesn't answer. "What's the matter? Are you in love with her or something?" "Yes." You're shocked, not by the totally predictable truth, but by the unhesitating and firm way in which he announces it, so uncharacteristic of his usual tsuntsun act, and you have no witty response. "I can't get her out of my head. She's the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. In between, I dream about her. I'm obsessed." He stares up at the night sky. "It's ruining me." "Why are you telling me this?" You ask.Auburn shrugs. He doesn't face you. "I guess because I know you'll keep my secret.""Bold assumption...""I'm sure you'd rather not deal with Amber's reaction. You have enough on your plate to begin with.""Point taken."At last he turns around. "What do you think? Do you think I've got a chance?"You mull it over. Amber is your sister, and you know her far more intimately than even Auburn suspects, but at last, you have to admit: "I don't know. I can't see into her heart.""I can't either. I guess no one can. It's why I love her."
>>5001624Fucking class, Wes.>>5001631wew lad
He heads for his tent again. You stand awkwardly beside him as he unzips the flap. He pauses, frowning at you. "Looking for somewhere to sleep?" You glance back towards the Moms' tent. Faintly, but distinctly, you hear K-Mom's characteristic "ungh... ungh..." which means those two are only just getting started in there."As a matter of fact, yeah, I am," you tell him."Well, you're welcome to sleep with us," Auburn says, holding the tent flap open and motioning with one arm towards the dark inside. So gentlemanly. But then there's an edge to his voice that you've never heard, at least not directed your way, as he adds: "might be dangerous, though.""Dangerous?" You repeat."One girl, sharing her tent with two guys. Never know what'll happen."[ ] Go in.[ ] Decline.
>>5001634Fuck it, I'm horny.>[x] Go in.
>>5001634>[X] Go in.There is no way I could vote no.
>>5001634>[x] Go in.We're here to solve the mystery of the three tents, and by god that's what we're gonna do.
>>5001634In we go
>>5001612W o r r y>KDOWWhat's this stand for, again?
>>5001674https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/KDOWThis, most likely.
>>5001547Man that's cute. Great dad energy.
Please wait warmly.
>>5001715Warmly and gladly.
>>5001821Almost done. Editing now.
It's nearly time.
>>5001880Jesus Christ, Wes.
Tou stand there in the middle of the tent between Will and Auburn's sleeping bags as you finish wiping yourself off. Well. As much as you reasonably can, anyway. There was a lot to wipe. Thankfully this tent is well stocked with supplies for it. "Are you a convert now or what?" Will asks.You gaze at the wadded-up blue paper toweling in your hand. "Yeah. These work pretty well.""I'm telling you, dude. Shop towels are the best. Soft like woah. Hella absorbent. You'll never go back to Kleenex again.""Can you please stop with the shop towel pitch?" Auburn says. "I swear to god. Do you work for the company that makes them or what?" "Just sayin."Auburn sits up, gesticulating. "Stop! Stop sayin!""Pfft. Okay, Hitler. Then tell me you don't like 'em too. Look me in the eyes and tell me. You can't. You can't do it. Because you know it's the truth."You toss the used shop towel at him, and it lands on his chest. He groans, disgusted, as he swats it away."You sleeping or nah?" Will asks."Yeah, fina--" you begin. Then: "Shit," you mutter. "I forgot my sleeping bag in Summer's tent.""...Go get it?" Will says."I'm not walking back into that minefield. They're having a family meeting.""Uff," Auburn grunts, commiserating, as he kicks back and lies with the back of his head on his folded arms. "Yeah. Better not to mess with that.""Can I use your sleeping bag?" You ask Will."Sure. Hop in, pardner.""Hop in... with you?" "Uh, yeah?"You shake your head. "What the hell is it with you freaks and sharing sleeping bags?" Will snorts. "Because sharing a sleeping bag, that sure is a gross thing to share. Sure. Okay.""You can sleep with one of us or you can sleep on the ground," Auburn says. "Don't expect us to give up our beds for you just because you gave up your ass for us." You slap your wrist against the crook of your other arm. "Bite me, Raisin Brant.""Come over here so I can bite you then."You stomp out of the tent.
>>5001880Oh. Wow. Oh wow.
You stand there in the middle of the tent between Will and Auburn's sleeping bags as you finish wiping yourself off. Well. As much as you reasonably can, anyway. There was a lot to wipe. Thankfully this tent is well stocked with supplies for it."Are you a convert now or what?" Will asks.You gaze at the wadded-up blue paper toweling in your hand. "Yeah. These work pretty well.""I'm telling you, dude. Shop towels are the best. Soft like woah. Hella absorbent. You'll never go back to Kleenex again.""Can you please stop with the shop towel pitch?" Auburn says. "I swear to god. Do you work for the company that makes them or what?""Just sayin."Auburn sits up, gesticulating. "Stop! Stop sayin!""Pfft. Okay, Hitler. Then tell me you don't like 'em too. Look me in the eyes and tell me. You can't. You can't do it. Because you know it's the truth."You toss the used shop towel at him, and it lands on his chest. He groans, disgusted, as he swats it away."You sleeping or nah?" Will asks."Yeah, fina--" you begin. Then: "Shit," you mutter. "I forgot my sleeping bag in Summer's tent.""...Go get it?" Will says."I'm not walking back into that minefield. They're having a family meeting.""Uff," Auburn grunts, commiserating, as he kicks back and lies with the back of his head on his folded arms. "Yeah. Better not to mess with that.""Can I use your sleeping bag?" You ask Will."Sure. Hop in, pardner.""Hop in... with you?""Uh, yeah?"You shake your head. "What the hell is it with you freaks and sharing sleeping bags?"Will snorts. "Because sharing a sleeping bag, that sure is a gross thing to share. Sure. Okay.""You can sleep with one of us or you can sleep on the ground," Auburn says. "Don't expect us to give up our beds for you just because you gave up your ass for us."You slap your wrist against the crook of your other arm. "Bite me, Raisin Brant.""Come over here so I can bite you then."You get dressed and stomp out of the tent.
>>5001886THAT'S where you draw the line, Wes? Really?
>>5001888>"Bite me, Raisin Brant."And I hoped this was the timeline where we could all be friends.
The tent Amelia and Olivia share is the only one with light still emanating. Let no one accuse you of failing to learn from past mistakes. Knocking on a tent's door didn't work. So this time, you decide on giving stealth a try. The zippered flap isn't entirely done up, so you can poke a finger into the gap, pry it open, and slip inside. If you're being honest, your sneakery here is driven less by the fear of being mistaken for a bear, and more by curiosity -- you kind of want to catch the two of them in the act. You want to know what it's like. How Amelia treats her lover. How Olivia is as a lover.You're way too late. They've already done the deed, multiple times judging by the acrid smell that fills the tent, and now they're enjoying the afterglow. Amelia, wearing only a loose-fitting tee, is on her knees, straddling Olivia's naked body, a thigh on either side of Olivia's butt. Her back is to you. Her very, very prodigious back. That tee doesn't hang quite low enough. She's giving Olivia a tender, thorough -- but seemingly chaste -- deep-tissue massage, as Olivia, cheek on her folded arms, dreamily rests her heavy eyelids. Olivia's pale breasts pressing against the fabric of the comforter below her remind you of uncooked dough on a baking sheet.Amelia sings as her soft hands knead Olivia's back. You've never heard her like this, and never suspected she had such a tuneful singing voice. It's a voice seemingly purpose-made to carry such a Hollywood standard: Moon River,Wider than a mile.I'm crossin' you in style, somedayOh, dream maker.You heart breaker.Wherever you're goin',I'm goin' your way.Two driftersOff to see the world.There's such a lot of worldTo see.We're after the sameRain-bow's end,Waitn' 'round the bend,My huckleberry friend,Moon RiverAnd me."I'm sleepy," Olivia coos."Yeah, I bet you are," Amelia says, still working her hands."You can keep me up all night and then put me right to sleep. Just like that.""Mm hmm.""I love you," Olivia says. Amelia keeps massaging her. You stand around, watching them, in awkward silence, not sure when or even whether to make yourself known.Olivia peeks open an eye and looks up at Amelia. "We have company.""I know," Amelia says. She doesn't turn, but only keeps her hypnotic massage going. "Some naughty girl snuck in. What should we do?""Mmm... I think we should spank her.""Oh my," Amelia purrs. "Well, if you think that's best."
>>5001898Cute. Cute!>"Mmm... I think we should spank her."Oh god oh fuck.>>5001899Looking forward to it as always!
>>5001880Wes being called a "good girl" must be so nice for her~
>>5001898CuuuteGood shit, OP.
>>5001899Good show, I really like getting to have these moments with our boys and girls separately to learn more about them in a way?
>>5001899I'm sure this also will be wholesome.
>>5001880>"Think of me as the consolation prize.">"Shit, Wes. You're a grand prize in my book.">You like Will. You really do.I like Will! I really, really do!
>>5001880Damn OP, you must've been holding onto this Auburn energy for a while. Hitting it out of the park with these recently.
>>5001898Ah. No rest for the Wicked.
>>5002193I like to surprise with characters in bed! So Summer turns out to be shy and timid the first time we hook up, but Auburn turns out to be really dominant. Eroticism often comes from unexpected discoveries.
>>5002280>Eroticism often comes from unexpected discoveries.Like huge and stiff futacocks
>>5001880More Raisin Brant. Very good.
>>5002678>GIRLS FUCKED: 8/11YOOOOOOO WHAT
>>5002685The previous counter didn't account for the additions of Liz and Winter.We've already done Winter, but there are Mommies left to conquer.
>>5002690Oh right, of course.(But now I want a soft taco!)
>>5002690Alright, let's tally.>Amber*>Summer*>Amelia*>Lily*>Talia*>Olivia*>Liz>Winter*>Noelle>Kay>Vivian*>Smatters*(?)I guess Smatters doesn't count, since the numbers make sense otherwise.
>>5002698I didn't intent to include Vivian or Smatters. I can't believe I've miscounted... again...Fuck counters in a lesbian harem are hard, okay?
>>5002706Which means we're really at 7/11 because of taco bell girl, right?
The Moms are sitting by the firepit with some of the others as you groggily shuffle out of the tent. You shield your eyes from the blazing sun and squint at them."The dead rise," N-Mom says."Wow. Look who finally decided to come out of their cave," K-Mom says.You hate this shit so much more than it should be possible to hate anything. You glance around, rubbing the sleep from your eyes and smacking your lips. Liz is eating a sandwich and talking in low tones with Summer on the other side of the firepit. Winter is kneeling in the dirt, off on the middle distance, packing a tackle box with provisions -- and trying to convince Gideon to tag along for the fishing. Will is climbing a tree. Lily is standing at the base of it repeatedly calling him a dumbass. You plop down between your Mommies. "God," you heave."What's up?" K-Mom asks.You shrug. "Some days just feel like they last a month, you know?""You going fishing with us?""I don't know what I'm going," you say. You wince, and reach behind yourself, and rub your butt. "My butt's sore.""Bet it's not as sore as mine," N-Mom says."I slept in Amelia's tent."She nods once, silently yielding back the balance of her time. Of course, Amelia isn't the sole cause of your anal distress. Her spanking this morning was pretty brutal, but you were feeling ass-blasted well before that, too. Somehow, though, it seems more shameful to admit to your parents that you did it with some of your classmates than to let them think you did it with a futanari old enough to be your third mother and endowed enough to have a third leg."Hungry?" N-Mom asks."I should brush first.""Yeah, your breath is pretty stank," she agrees."Thanks Mom. Where'd you guys pack my toothbrush?"They stare at you like a couple of gay deer in headlights."You packed my toothbrush, right?""Nnnnnyes," N-Mom says."Nyes?""Nyet.""Oh my God."Behind you, you hear a thump followed by a yowl of pain and peals of laughter. You turn in place. The eagle has landed: Will has fallen from the treetop and collided with the Earth amid plumes of dust. "I told you!" Lily shouts. "You fuckin' dumbass!" "We'll pick you up a toothbrush at the store," K-Mom says. "We have to stop in town for some other stuff anyway."You open your mouth as wide as you can and breathily exhale into her face: "hahhhh.""Fuck." K-Mom recoils, plugging her nose. "We have mouthwash. Use that for now.""Where?""In the RV. In the medicine cabinet in the..." she trails off, looks down at her lap, and fiddles with the black denim of her jeans."In the what. Say it.""In the bathroom.""Is she still not out of there?" You demand.The Moms just shrug."Sick of this shit," you say, rising."Wes--" N-Mom says, grabbing for your wrist."Hahhh."N-Mom recoils. You pull free of her and go marching towards the RV's open door.
>>5002733>Some days just feel like they last a month, you know?haah waawTalia ;w;
"Talia." You knock on the door. "Talia! I know you're upset, but this isn't any way to deal!" You knock louder. "We care about you, so... come out! Come be a part of the world again! Talia!" You start to really pound. The thin partition shakes and shudders and rattles. "Snuggy Bear! Hey! ... Answer me!" All at once you stop, leaning your forehead against the door, equal parts angry and despondent. Then, resolving yourself, you announce, "that's it. I'm breaking down the door."You brace yourself and swing with all your weight against the door, using your shoulder for a battering ram. It only takes one try to blow the door clean open, and you almost stumble ass-over-teakettle into the cramped bathroom stall. Righting yourself, you first notice that the bathroom is empty -- the door was unlocked the whole time. Then in your peripheral vision, you notice Talia, standing at the threshold of the RV's little sleeping compartment, watching you in mute befuddlement. You turn to fully face her, clear your throat. "Uh. I was getting worried about you."She clears her throat, too, and also pulls a sort of vaguely disgusted face."Hold on a sec," you say, turn towards the bathroom, and swig a few healthy swigs of Listerine.
>>5002741This was a much better outcome than I was expecting from that setup.
When you come back out, Talia is gone, and the door to the sleeping compartment is closed. You let yourself in. She's on the top bunk, facing the wall. You climb up onto the first rung of the ladder to see her more clearly. Carrying on a conversation from this position is awkward. But if you didn't know how to power through an awkward scenario, you'd have died years and years ago."Minty fresh," you say.She doesn't answer."Are you doing all right?"She doesn't answer."We've got a lot of stuff planned today. Lots of... activities. So many activities. You should come out and do some activities with us. Be an activity doer."Glancing her once over, you see she's still wearing what she was wearing yesterday, a thin black tanktop and skirt, both stained with her own blood, and in the gap between them, her belly, wrapped in white gauze. She lies as motionless as a corpse. "I'm here for you," you say, lamely, the only platitude that comes to mind. "Hate me," Talia says."Huh?"She stays facing the wall. "Save your time. Hate me."You shake your head. "But... I don't."She starts to shiver. You're confused at first. Without the engine running, there's no A/C, and it's as muggy in here as it is out there. Then you figure it out. Emotionless Talia Berenstoin, your Snuggy Bear, isn't cold. She's crying. You climb into bed with her and hug her to your body. Weird being the big spoon, but nice, in its own way. "I don't hate you.""You should. Your father almost died because of me. Your mothers. You...""Oh. I didn't know I was hugging Samuel Buridan. Well that changes everything.""He came to me. I let him in... I treated his wounds. I saved him from dying.""Did you want to?""I let him do it. Your father was standing there and I just... let him do it.""Did you want to?" You repeat."I had a knife. When he came. I could have... taken him down... fought him--""Talia. Talia, come here--" You struggle with her and get her to turn around in your embrace so you lie face-to-face. "Did you want to help him?"She shakes her head."Then it isn't your fault."Her mouth trembles. It's so strange to see her face streaked with tears, her mascara gunky and her usually stoic features all quivery. Maybe even stranger to hear her sniffling. "I'm a bad person," she says."No--""He's my brother. What's in him is in me." You shake your head emphatically. "And -- I'm a teacher who has sex with her own students--""Really good sex--""I'm a loser, I'm a -- nothing -- I can't stand -- me -- I'm such a coward.""I love you," you say.She holds her face to your chest and your shirt seeps through with her tears. She's still shivering. But in a tender voice, after many long minutes of crying, she says "I love you" back.
That's all for tonight. I'll return next weekend. Meanwhile, vote on camping activities:[ ] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer![ ] Hiking with N-Mom and Liz![ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian![ ] Kayaking with Lily and Amelia![ ] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn![ ] Ghost stories with Olivia! [ ] Custom!Vote for up to 3.
>>5002754Oh hell yeah time for some kyanpu daThat said, I'm gonna think on these options and vote later
>>5002754I just wanna grill for pete's sake!>[x] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer!>[x] Exploring with Amber and Aunt Vivian!>[x] Ghost stories with Olivia! (let's make s'mores!)
>>5002757Grilling with Gideon is always an option too!
>>5002754Still need to catch up a bit since I wasn't around when it was live, but I'm gonna put my votes in.>[x] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!>[x] Custom: Improv Quiz Bowl with Amber and Aunt Vivian! (Plus anyone else who wants in)>[x] Ghost stories with Olivia!
>>5002754>[x] Hiking with N-Mom and Liz!>[x] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!>[x] Firearms drilling with N-Mom, Auburn, Amber and Lily.
>>5002754[X] Ghost stories with Olivia![X] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer!and>>5002767>[X] Custom: Improv Quiz Bowl with Amber and Aunt Vivian! (Plus anyone else who wants in)
>>5002754>[ ] Ghost stories with Olivia! >[ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian!>[ ] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!
>>5002754RAISIN BRSNTKAYAKINGGHOST STORIES
Why do I always forget this thread updates late on the weekends and then suddenly remember when I’m getting ready for work on the following Monday and then subsequently can’t read it until I get home?>>5002754>[X] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer!>[X] Custom: Improv Quiz Bowl with Amber and Aunt Vivian! (plus anyone else who wants in)>[X] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!
>>5002754>[ ] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!>[ ] Hiking with N-Mom and Liz!>[ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian!Seem fun to me.
>>5001880Wow. Is all I can say. This is the first time I have ever understood why Amber likes this guy. The way he acts in this scene feels like going back in time and reading a pastebin with Alabaster from season 3 or something. More of this please.I wonder how Alabaster would react to finding out about Auburn fucking two of his daughters.>>5002941Seriously. At least it’s nice to come back to lots of content. >>5002754[ ] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer![ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian![ ] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!
>>5003116I think Alabaster is at least trying to distance himself from the idea of fucking his own daughters. Obviously buttslut Amber throw a kink into this idea, but as far as this narrative is concerned, he's resisted so far.
>>5003137I dunno, with how his weird fucked up relationship with his first cousin (once removed) turned wife is, I wouldn’t put it past them to have invited Amber into their bed again like in 421.Which reminds me, we haven’t seen any of (non sister) Rose yet in the OVA
>>5003549We saw her very briefly. Ally's head was between her legs.
Shit, forgot to vote:>>5002754> [ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian!> [ ] Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn!> [ ] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer!
>>5003553I don’t think I remember that having happened…
>>5003559Found it!https://archived.moe/qst/thread/4797605To be fair, it was a long time ago.
>>5003570That was... supposed to link to the actual post. Just Ctrl+F Aunt Rose and you'll find it.
>>5003570I literally forgot all about that. Thanks for the reminder, Anon-dono.
>>5003595There was also a brief moment where Rose and Charlotte were gossiping about Wes, and when Rose and Alabaster were discussing the state of 422 post-Cerise getting shot.
>>5003614The latter I do remember now that you mention it
>>5004072Whitney advances to the second round! Be sure to vote!
>>5003559>>5003570I wonder what Rose and Whitney look like now and what Alabaster's actual harem is at the moment.
>>5004131I think the Harem's gained one or two girls since the end of S4, seeing as Alex and Amelia were canoodling in the Shake 'em Up. Though that could be a conquest entirely independent of other relationships.>>5004353Man, what is Scarlett feeding these girls?
>>5004583Well if Amber and Amelia herself are to be believed, Amelia is absolutely entangled with Alabaster's harem.
>>5004131>>5004353We do have older versions of those two as rendered by DigitalArchive. I really like them!
>>5002754[ ] Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer![ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian![ ] Ghost stories with Olivia!
>>5004598What a riot that first coupling must have been. Especially if Alex was involved.>You have a penis?
>>5005118TIE BREAKING VOTE, LADSIf you haven't voted yet, you have 3 hours from the linked post to help out /ourgirl/!
>>5005128Well everyone, democracy is ruined.
>>5005164This is what happens when democracy fails.Well, we tried.
>>5002754Just going with my gut for what would be the most fun.>[x] Hiking with N-Mom and Liz!>[x] Ghost stories with Olivia!>[x] Kayaking with Lily and Amelia!
>>5004583Amelia don't seem like a bottom.>>5004853There any more?
>>5006496Yeah, odds are good Alex was catching more than he pitched. Though if there's any person I could see topping Mel, it's him.
>>5006496If the Bosphorus Books massage scene is anything to go by, then Amelia is perfectly content bottoming (though admittedly she was also topping at the same time).
>>5002754[ ] Hiking with N-Mom and Liz![ ] Exploring with Amber and aunt Vivian![ ] Custom! (Quiz bowl suggestion)
>>5006794That's not being penetrated anon, that's subbing. They're different.
>>5007620Tomayto, tomahto. If it's Amelia, I'd take either option.
Want to give a relatively early update that there will be no major updates to the episode this weekend, but you can check back for a (non-lewd?) bonus scene tonight.I'll also call the vote tally so it doesn't change on me again:Chilling at camp with Talia, Will, and Auburn: 7Fishing with K-Mom, Winter, and Summer: 6Exploring with Amber and Aunt Vivian: 6Ghost Stories with Olivia: 6Custom: Improv Quiz Bowl with Amber and Aunt Vivian (plus anyone else who wants in): 5Hiking with N-Mom and Liz: 4Firearms drilling with N-Mom, Auburn, Amber, and Lily: 1Kayaking with Lily and Amelia: 1Final note, a question for y'all. How do you guys actually feel about Alabaster and Amber... you know...
>>5008788While I'd have been for it before, I feel like Alabaster really is trying to distance himself from his daughters in... that way. Plus we all know how easily he gets jealous - finding out abouy Auburn and Will might still be a tougb pill for him to swallow if he chooses to go down that route as opposed to releasing her into the wild.
>>5006496oh, I forgot to respondhttps://www.op-studios.net/fq-art-digitalarchive
>>5008788All of this has happened before, all of this will happen again (wrt the spoiler question)
>>5008788Kind of wish I had voted, considering the quiz bowl write-in, but at this point I trust FQ knows best.Have to agree with this: >>5008848 If Alabaster wants to protect Wesley as his "surrogate" daughter as much as he has, I can't see his "actual" daughter being much different. An Alabaster-as-Kaji moment between the two could be kind of funny though. I might change my mind, but that's how I think about it right now.
>>5008788>How do you guys actually feel about Alabaster and Amber... you know...Disgusted. Scandalized. Eager
There are over 100 people in line outside Shake 'em Up when the helicopter arrives. It touches down at the edge of the parking lot on a specially cordoned-off, tarped-off area. This causes commotion and general ill-ease. Folks on the ground have to shield their ears and faces from the howl of whipping wind and kicked-up dust -- including Amelia. The chopper's rotors whir to a halt, the riveted door on the side slides open. Amelia watches, mouth trembling, as, removing their earmuffs, several upper-level executives from Darkbloom Enterprises file out. They wear sharp suits that probably cost more than a year's wages at the restaurant. Vivian Darkbloom, Whitney Soliloquy, and Alabaster Soliloquy are among the retinue. She recognizes them and hopes they will not recognize her back. A young man bringing up the rear and holding a steel briefcase hands it off to Vivian, who takes it briskly in hand and leads the group past the serpentine line of stunned onlookers, towards the restaurant's entrance. As they pass, it is clear that they are deep in an important conversation that must not be interrupted. Amelia interrupts it anyway:"Erm..." she asks, leaning just a little bit out of the single-file line. "Will the interviews be starting soon?"The other hopefuls in line with her give her a look like she's a lunatic.The executives stop in their tracks. Vivian seems somewhere on the gradient between frustrated to enraged. Whitney is bemusedly confused. Alabaster is just impatient. They all three continue on without replying. Amelia can actually feel herself withering in place where she stands, and contemplates leaving right then.The young man who handed Vivian the briefcase stays outside. Clasping his hands together, he addresses the entire group: "Hi! My name is Alex Best. I know you've all been waiting for a while, so please bear with us. Interviews will be the last phase of the process. We'll be reviewing applications prior to that at the tents over there." He points to a series of squat white tents, previously closed, which are just opening up to reveal worker bees seated at little tables inside. "Stay in line. You will be called forward in the order you came and processed. If you get selected for an interview, you will be sent to the waiting area over there." He points at another tent, a larger one, where there are some carafes full of water and lemonade for refreshment, along with chairs for resting. "You'll be called from the waiting area one by one to have your interview with the team." He flashes a smile specifically at Amelia. "Make sense?"Amelia nods."Great." The next bit is directed at everyone: "We hope to see you inside!" And then he goes.
>>5009380Ohhh boy. I can tell I'm gonna like this.Damn, you're up late. (Early?)
The process is tedious to the point of soul-sucking. By the time Amelia gets to one of the processing tents, her feet ache from standing so long in pumps and her makeup is running from sweating in the noonday sun. There she has to answer a series of rapid-fire and seemingly arbitrary pop-quiz style questions for an anonymous processor on topics from food safety (what temperature does beef need to reach to be safe for human consumption?) to knowledge of the company (what is Shake 'em Up's motto?) to number-sense (the customer pays for an order of $12.24 with a $20 bill; how much change are they due back?) to pure psychological interrogation (why do you want to work here?) The processor then reviews her resume for anything immediately disqualifying, and seeing nothing amiss, directs her to the waiting area for those lucky few who have made it to the interview portion. Maybe fewer than 10% of applicants get even this far, and Amelia counts herself lucky as she eyes the thinning herd.Amelia is pouring herself some lemonade when that young man from before comes up behind her. She startles as, turning, putting the cup to her lips, she notices him. She lets out a little pip of surprise, splashing herself with droplets of the lemonade, and hopes to high heaven he didn't notice that. He either really didn't notice or at least has the tact to pretend as much. He just brushes past and gets a plastic cup for himself to fill. Smiling her way, he says: "it's cold and it's fresh and it's all homemade.""B-bum bum bum," Amelia stammers, unsure, panicking internally over whether Mr. Best really meant to make the reference. His laughter is easy and disarming. Amelia calms down at the positive reaction. "Killer weather, huh?" He says. "Sorry for the wait.""It's fine." She glances around. "You have a lot of people who want to work here!""It's a great company to work for... the pay, the benefits... we're a big Shake 'em Up family here." He cringes at her put-on smile. "Oh God. I can't believe what I sound like. I'm really drinking the koolaid over here.""Or lemonade, as the case may be," Amelia says.They toast at the air between them and sip together."I swear it's not just buzz-speak," Alex promises. "We try to do right by our people.""I know. I've been reading Glass Door reviews and all that -- I really want to get in."Alex smiles brightly. "Just do your best! I'm sure you'll be fine."Amelia watches him over the transparent rim of her cup as he turns for a refill. He's cute. Very cute. Just her type, really, with his somewhat shaggy mop of hair and pale blue eyes and milky skin. He seems too... innocent, to be a corporate executive at such a humongous company. "Word of advice," Alex says, turning, whispering as he shields his mouth with the cup he holds. "Focus on Whitney. Impress her -- and the job is yours. Don't worry about Vivian."Amelia nods vigorously. "Gotcha ... thanks."Alex winks, and Amelia feels like her heart could melt.
When at last Amelia is beckoned into the blessedly air conditioned diner, she finds her interviewers sitting all in a row at one of the booths: Alabaster at the far end, Whitney by the window, the short and intimidating Vivian in the middle. Since this location is closed today to accommodate the mass-interview process at hand, the atmosphere inside the diner has an eerily quiet tenseness to it. This space is at once too wide open and too claustrophobic. "Oh." Vivian murmurs. "You made it past the filter." Amelia sits, heart thudding. There's a brief silence. Vivian motions with a palm. "Well? Let's see your resume." "R-right," Amelia says, turning, and pulling a copy from the little file holder she has with her. She slides it across the tabletop.Vivian reads intently, line-by-line. Whitney peeks for only a moment or two before becoming bored and looking away. Alabaster seems to be reading along over Vivian's shoulder, but not as closely, his eyes scanning. "You have certainly been around," Vivian muses. Amelia nods, although Vivian has her eyes peeled on the document.Alabaster glances up. "It says here that you're no longer with your most recent employer. Why did you leave?""I was looking for something new. More challenging.""You didn't have anything lined up before quitting?" Alabaster says. "Erm -- no."Vivian glances up now as well, gobsmacked. "Are you joking? But we're in the midst of the worst recession since 2020." "I know," Amelia says with a tremulous voice. "I -- can't say it's not a scary time to be looking for work! But... I wasn't being used to the best extent-- or-- what I mean is--""You've got guts, I'll give you that," Whitney says. "--Thank you," Amelia says, feeling things somewhat defused.Whitney points. "Crazy as hell. But you've got guts." Amelia gulps and looks away, unsure how to take that. Whitney, gripping the edge of the table, leans partway across. She squints. "Say. You look kinda familiar. Do I know you?"Amelia shrugs. But that's not enough to divert the tingles of where-do-I-know-your-face-from that now have arced like electricity from Whitney to Vivian to Alabaster. They all consider her, then give each other silent looks, probing their collective memory banks -- but all of them seem to come up blank.Vivian picks the resume up again and leafs through it. "Miss... van der Boom -- I have concerns. You haven not held down a job for more than a year or two years at a stretch. Examples. Pottery Barn, August 2022 to October 2022. 7-Eleven, May 2021 to January 2022. Taco Bell, November 2020. Safeway, November... 2018 through... December... 20... 19..." Her widening eyes lift from the paper and her little jaw goes slack as the true recognition dawns. Alabaster is similarly mortified.Only Whitney sees the humor. She loudly claps her hands together. "Heeeh. So THAT'S how we know you!" She turns towards the other two. "Small world. Huh?"Amelia is crimson.
>>5009392lmao holy shitHistory repeats itself yet again
Vivian clears her throat and finds biting sarcasm beneath her embarrassment. "So. How many weeks may we expect you to work for our company before you quit without notice?" "As long as you're a good employer," Amelia mutters at her own lap where she's worrying her hands."Excuse me?" Vivian snaps.Amelia looks Vivian in the eye. Her voices goes steady and firm. "You can expect me to work here for as long as you're a good employer."This doesn't placate Vivian: "I see. So it's our job to keep your every desire well-attended and satisfied.""No. It's your job to keep me from wanting to leave."Vivian is so perplexed by the brashness of Amelia's replies that she struggles to find any words at all. Finally she tries to hand Amelia back her resume. "I think we've heard eno--""I'm a good worker," Amelia says. "You can call any one of those employers on my resume and ask. Even the ones who employed me over a decade ago. They all remember me. They remember that I was the best worker they had. They remember being sad that I left. After I've been somewhere... it's very hard to fill the hole I leave behind.""Is that so?" Vivian says. Whitney has her chin on her hands, eager to see what comes next of these flying sparks. Alabaster is watching with a quirked eyebrow. "It is so," Amelia says. "When I run a store, I run it as if it were my own business. I keep it clean. I keep it orderly. I keep the customers happy. I leave only when it's obvious that I'm the only one who cares about those things, or when management treats its workforce unfairly, or when I can tell that my efforts aren't being valued for the value they create.""How impressive. I've never met such a proud minimum wage employee," Vivian says cruelly."Thank you," Amelia says sincerely. She draws a deep breath. "I don't have a college diploma and I don't know how to run the world the way the bigwigs like you can. But I'm good at the things I do. This store, for example -- I can tell it needs some work. I'd be happy to help. I want to help." "This is Shake 'em Up #1," Vivian says. "It's our flagship location. What, pray-tell, do you in all your infinite wisdom feel needs improvement?" Amelia stands. "Come with me."
She goes behind the counter. Alabaster and Whitney are quick to follow, Vivian sluggish. "Whoever closed this store last night forgot to clean out the grease catches on the grill. You can smell it as soon as you walk in -- that congealed grease smell." She takes a spatula and swipes it across the inside lip of the grill's front. It comes back out with a nasty brown-and-yellow gunk along the chromed edge. She wipes it on a dish rag and sets the spatula back in its holder. "Nice sanitation here at your flagship location." She crosses over to the utensil holders sitting on the serving counter. "And look at this. These spoons are absolutely covered in water spots. Does anyone at your flagship location know how to do a vinegar rinse?" She thumbs through some of the spoons, holding them up to the light to demonstrate. Then she swings around the serving counter again, to inspect the permanently-mounted stools where customers sit. She presses on a couple of them with a flattened palm: "Wobbly. Wobbly. Oh, look -- gum on the underside. Poorly maintained seating here at your flagship. How does a customer like sitting on a wobbly, gum-encrusted stool?" She goes to the opposite wall before anyone can answer, to one of the windows by the booths there, and runs her fingers across the top of the Venetian blinds. "Uh huh. I see you like bunnies at your flagship location -- dust bunnies." She holds her palm before her face, puckers her lips, and blows. Vivian scrunches her face and sneezes at the shower of dust that sprays out. Alabaster coughs."We've seen enough, miss van der Boom," Vivian says."Me too. You can insult me all you want, but I know what I'm worth. Hire me or don't -- but you won't take that away from me.""Why do you want to work here?" Alabaster asks.So it's that question again. Amelia opens her mouth, ready to recite the same bullshit spiel she gave to the drone who first processed her, but then thinks better of it. "I need the money," she admits. "You pay a lot more than most of the places I'm qualified for.""So you'll come in and fix everything wrong with whatever Shake 'em Up in the valley we send you to," Alabaster says, skeptical."I'll go above and beyond in whatever position you put me in. I can't do it all by myself. But I'll do everything I can within my power, with all my heart, and that's a promise.""How are you with customers?" Whitney wants to know. "Whitney," Vivian murmurs, turning her head, impatient to ends things."When you aren't catchin' 'em fuckin'," Whitney adds, literally elbowing Vivian. Vivian reddens."I'm always nice with customers. Until they get too unruly, and then I gently see them out.""We'll be in touch," Vivian says. "Please go."Amelia glances at Whitney. "Uhh -- yeah," Whitney says. She points back and forth from Vivian to Alabaster. "We'll infer and then let you know if we pick you.""Confer," Alabaster says."We'll give you a ring.""If we pick you," Vivian adds -- emphasis on "if."
>>5009403>So it's that question again. Amelia opens her mouth, ready to recite the same bullshit spiel she gave to the drone who first processed her, but then thinks better of it. "I need the money," she admits. "You pay a lot more than most of the places I'm qualified for."Muh based Amelia. I'm in no management position, nor do I ever see myself ever being in one, but if I was I'd sure as hell like to hire someone who was this blunt as opposed to someone who produced the usual nonsense of deeply caring about [corporation].
Amelia crosses the sunbaked parking lot and finds her rattly, rusty subcompact parked across the street, at the curb, with not one but two pink parking tickets pinned under her wipers. She rips them away without looking at them and plops down in the driver's seat. She rests her forehead on the searingly hot steering wheel, rubs it back and forth to feel the wrinkling of the skin on her skull. Her mettle has entirely collapsed, replaced with despair, and now she repeats "no, no, no, no, no..." to herself -- trying to drown out the self-hatred and self-anger. She slaps the wheel with one palm and then the other like a metronome. "No, no, no, no..." How spectacularly can someone mess up a job interview? Well. Start by getting into an argument with the person interviewing you...She sits bolt upright when there's a gentle tap on her window. Alex Best is standing outside. She cracks open the door since the window on her side can't roll down."Are you all right, uh..." "Amelia.""Amelia. I saw you coming out and you seemed upset.""I got eaten alive.""Vivian?"Amelia nods sadly."Do you mind if I..." Alex says, making a little motion with an index finger to indicate getting into the car with her. Amelia shrugs, so he does. He lays a hand on her arm. "It's a tough economy. I know. But you seem really nice. If they say no, I'm sure you'll find something.""I had something. I have something. But I'm too scared to..." she trails off, shakes her head. "Thanks, Mr. Best.""Alex. Please."Amelia wipes her eyes to get rid of any incipient tears. "You're nice, too, Alex." Glancing down at his hand on her arm, she notices his wedding band. He's nice and also married. Of course."I can take another copy of your resume, if you have one," he says. "Put in a good word with Whitney. And if there's anything else I can do... here... how about these tickets? At least let me take care of those. You only got them because we kept you waiting so long your meter ran out of time."Amelia considers Alex with jaded eyes as he takes the parking slips from her dashboard where she tossed them. Is he genuinely such a sweet person, or is he a philandering bastard trying to schmooze his way to an easy lay? Either way... he'd be fun to surprise... and he'd probably be into it, too, the little -- oh, but that's only an idle passing fantasy for the dirty part of her mind that flares up when she's stressed. The prospect of following through on it sends shivers of mortification up her spine. She could never.Another surprising knock at the window, on Alex's side. Alabaster Soliloquy. Alex rolls the window down."What would Sable say?" Alabaster asks with a frown."Oh, Ally, don't be like that. I just wanted to make sure she was okay after whatever Vivian did to her. She got this poor lady half in tears. I thought you were going to keep a lid on her, huh?""Well, I didn't," Alabaster says. He gives Amelia a curt nod. "When can you start?"Amelia gawps at him.
"I cannot believe you," Vivian says once Alabaster hurries out and she's alone with Whitney in the restaurant."What?""What? What? What do you mean, what? There is a process, Whitney--""Process schmocess--""--we agreed to confer after we finish the interviews, to rank-order the applicants, assign the top 30 to a prioritized list of store locations, and send out our offers a week from now.""Okay."There's a long silence."Well?" Vivian demands. "What happened to that?""When you know, you know," Whitney says. "Simple as.""We agreed to this. So for you to run off, half-cocked... to immediately extend an offer -- to a woman who was so impetuous and rude and so obviously flighty and flaky--""Hey!" Whitney barks. "I remember another thing we agreed to! That Shake 'em Up is MY business, 100%, that you and Dad don't get to supervene me, or whatever... that this is my show! This is Whitney's show! You said!""This is not Whitney's show! It absolutely, positively, is not Whitney's show--""You are here to advise. That's it. So get with the advising and leave the decising to me." She jerks a thumb at her own chest."Fine. I am advising you in the strongest possible terms to think twice before hiring a liability like Amelia van der Boom."Whitney points at Vivian. "Advice rejected."Vivian glowers.Whitney puts her hands on her hips. "You're just pissed because she dunked on you. You're so owned right now.""I am not owned," Vivian says."You're owned.""I am not owned!! I am not owned!!!"
Whitney, shaking her head, turns towards the window. "It's fine. If she doesn't work out, we either fire her or she quits. Economy like this, we'll have 200 more people beating down the door to replace her.""Just tell me one thing," Vivian demands."What?" "That you aren't only hiring her because she has a penis."Whitney wheels. "Excuse the fuckety fuck out of me?"Vivian stares. "You... did notice that she has a penis. Right?""What are you talking about? Are you tripping acid or something right now? Or did you develop X-ray vision all of a sudden."Sitting down again at the booth where they've been speaking with interviewees, Vivian sighs and says, "must I recite my long list of observations -- the musky scent, the bulge in her slacks, the way she walked to hide it... or will you trust my perception on at least one thing today?""Oh, I can trust a hose hound like you to sniff out some hose," Whitney laughs. "It's just a surprise is all.""Do you want me to--" the man sitting across from Vivian begins, pointing over his shoulder at the door."Your interview will begin in a moment," Vivian tells him. "Please be patient.""If I knew Amelia had a dick, I'd be the one running out to give her the offer," Whitney says. "Ally doesn't need another badass blonde bitch to peg him. His butt is sore enough already.""Spare me the mental images."Whitney nudges Vivian's shoulder from behind. "Are you just embarrassed still? Over how she saw you getting creamed in the middle of a Safeway that one time?""No.""Because she totally saw you two, and she was cool about it. Wasn't she? So what's your major issue here?""She isn't going to work out," Vivian says. "That's all there is to it. Then I will be the first to say I told you so.""Ehh, maybe," Whitney says. "But I've got a good feeling about this one." She slides in beside Vivian, forcing her to scooch, and half whispers: "...you're sure about the penis?""Ask her yourself if you don't believe me."Whitney grins in a way that makes it clear she intends to.That interview was seven years ago. Amelia's been at Store #1 ever since.
>>5009398>After I've been somewhere... it's very hard to fill the hole I leave behind."
>>5009404If there is one thing all big wig Corpos are absolutely sick of, it's people who are solely driven by Money, because Corpo life is absolutely infested with such people. The best bet is to tell them what you need the money for. If they're any kind of Millennial, go with "A House."Probably not an option for minimum wage workers; but Shake 'em Up is such a bizarro company that it very well could pay for one.>>5009407>>5009409Goddamn, I'm glad to see Whitney can still push Vivian's Buttons.
This is wonderful.
>>5008788>Final note, a question for y'all.Intrigued to see a scene like that again, loved them in the previous time line.
>>5009409>shakes shook 1/1Been looking forward to reading this all night--thanks OP!
>>5008788It's kinda weird on the last question. I would like to see it at some point, but don't really feel like they're there yet, if you know what I mean.
>>5010361Although thanks, now I'm imagining Ally lining himself up to take her virginity a third time and just being confused for the entirety of the experience.
>>5009407I AM NOT OWNED, I AM NOT OWNED.Now this is the Fuck Quest I read for.
>>5008788We fucked our MOM and our SISTER and our GIRLFRIEND'S mom and SISTER. FQOP, I WANT THAT DADDY GIRL RUINED. I WANT HER CUNT, CRUSHED. I WANT HER ANUS, ANNIHILIATED. I WANT HER FAMILY FUCKED. I WANNA BE ABLE TO GO TO HER HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND PISS ON HER ASHY FACE.Also, c'mon, Daddy's Girl managing to convince Vivian to let her go to the hospital and Vivian demonstrates how best to fuck Alabaster, being all clinical and precise? Amber ignoring her and riding that dick in her cooch like she's dreamed for years, squealing like a stuck hog? Maybe a rehash of the tea party scene? How the fuck could we not bang her out?
>>5010769I just want you to know that this is the best post anybody has made all season. I mean, besides OPI would definitely feel weird about Ally and Wes shacking up, but Amber clearly wants it, and it seems obvious that Alabaster hasn't been grooming her for it (probably the opposite if anything), so I don't have any real objections. Whether or not Alabaster would even want to is another question, I suppose.
>>5010769>We fucked our MOM and our SISTER and our GIRLFRIEND'S mom and SISTER.Good and valid points.
>>5010765Same. I missed this.>>5010769Yeah, this too.
>>5010889Wesley has fucked literally every family member she can get her grubby neat hands on-Amber, her moms, Vivian. I don't see why her Dad is any different.
>>5010889>Whether or not Alabaster would even want to is another question, I suppose.I could see him joining the harem to vet the others and piss off Rose.
>>5008848> finding out abouy Auburn and Will might still be a tougb pill for him to swallow if he chooses to go down that route as opposed to releasing her into the wild.OTOH, imagine Alabaster showing Amber what a real dicking is like. She would be arrogant at first thinking she knows what getting fucked is all about but Ally would wipe the grin off her face real quick.
>>5011391His dick is as monstrous, if not more so, then Amelia's.
>>5011403Exactly. Plus he knows how to use it. Nothing against Will and Auburn, but Alabaster would blow Amber’s mind in ways she can’t imagine. It would be so hot.